SOMBRE EXPLETIVES......

Of Playbooks and Plays

2011-08-24T05:22:00.000-07:00

Delhi provides a fascinating advantage for me that Mumbai does not... Resourceful friends :-) That apart .... getting my hands on the new Blackberry playbook was easier than I expected. Now being an iPad owner as well, I was immediately taken aback by the size difference.The playbook is almost 2/3 rds the size of my iPad and size wise, almost put me off at the first glance.

But what surprised me the most was the OS that powered this unassuming little thing. QNX developed by a Canadian Software firm was one of the most delightful mobile operating systems I had ever used up to date...I have jostled with Andriod, iOS, Symbian, Linux and Windows and therefore can proudly say that I am well aware of the pros and cons that each of them has to offer....

The ring-master is a dual-core, 1GHz TI OMAP processor that's efficiently caressed and used by the QNX OS. QNX is a decidedly efficient and water-tight operating system that fuels everything from alien-space ships to, well, little black tablets...

A five megapixel camera juts out the back, while a three megapixel module handles front-facing duties. That later is tucked under the glass and situated just above the seven-inch, 1,024 x 600 display that will threaten neither rods nor cones when on maximum brightness. It does, however, deliver lovely clarity and good viewing angles.

Graphics are taken care of by a PowerVR design, which quite handily offloads video decoding and gaming acceleration from the processor, enabling this thing to decode and display 1080p video over HDMI while still crawling along quite smoothly and running productivity apps on the seven-inch display. Not a hint of dithering or pixelation, of course. Apps load quickly, tend to be impressively responsive, and switching from one to the next is effortless.

To switch from one app to the next you can swipe inward from the left or the right, which pops the app out of full-screen and lets you move forward or back in the queue. A tap then maximizes your new favorite app. Or, a swipe up from the bottom gives you an even higher-level view of your running apps, which you can again zing your way through. Grabbing one and throwing it upward sends it to the garbage collector, or you can tap the tiny X that appears next to its name.

It's something of a serious tablet when compared to the competition running software from Apple and Google and, while it certainly has games, its biggest strengths are rather more boring. It does a really great job at displaying PowerPoint presentations, for example, and has the security chops to keep last quarter's dismal sales figures from falling into the wrong hands....

An impressive battery life of upto 7 hours (my iPad beats that...10 hours hahahahahaha ) lets it do its thing.

Over all, a great thing to pair with your blackberry handset (I do not have one Sob !!! :-( Symbian Zindabad !!!) but I managed to get hold of a friend who has one and used the impressive BRIDGE feature...

All in all....a nice little treat....(I stole adoring glances at it while it was tucked away in my bag :-) )

Now talking about plays..... (Again...thank you Delhi :-) )...

If you ever can (unlike me who had front row passes *gloating laugh* ) watch Frankenstein by Danny Boyle....It is in one word STUNNING !!!!!!!!!!!!

The use of technology to bring the stage to life is absorbing, riveting and super to say the least....

Cumberbatch (top left) alternates roles with Lee Miller (Top right) in Boyle's production who play both Frankenstein and the monster. The stage adaptation is a far cry from Mary Shelly's novel that I had received for standing first in class VI (lol)

Miller, however, strikes me as the more disturbing and poignant monster, while Cumberbatch undoubtedly has the edge as the scientist.

Danny Boyle's extraordinarily haunting production is set on the notion of alternating the two leading actors in the roles of Frankenstein and his brilliant handiwork.The role-reversal makes deep thematic sense because it highlights the irony whereby the son becomes the father, the slave the master.

It is a hell of a production. This taut, thrilling play runs to its awful conclusion without an interval, indeed with hardly a moment for breath.

I nearly fell out of my seat at the shock bridal-chamber scene. Twice.

As for now, I am recovering from the shock of having seen a masterpiece and twiddling away at the playbook with my thumbs...

Not often that you get to see the Playbook and a play based on a book all in the same time span, do you?? :-)

CIAO all :-)

Dedications........

2011-03-17T02:53:00.000-07:00

This is dedicated to my princess.

"D" : The password will be dedicated telephonically :-)

Show encrypted text

SEPTEMBER....

2010-10-23T05:04:00.000-07:00

I recently felt an urge to go and purge myself of all emotions bereft of any remorse J Granted that this emotion does not come knocking on your door everyday….but when it does…you do end up with a lump in your throat… I ended up typing some familiar lines on my laptop….I felt like sharing them with nobody in particular…so I decided to share it with everyone :-)

Wait until you are finally set free…
Don’t you worry, life will carry on…

Just take it slowly…

Cause the love you used to feel, is still there inside…
It may be a faded photograph, but I know that you care…

So don’t hide…
If you are scared….I am here beside you…
If you get lost…I am here to guide you…
I ll give you peace when peace is fragile…
Love is all the good in you…
Love is peace when peace is fragile….

How the time passed away…

All the troubles that we gave

And all those days we spent out talking to each other by the window pane..

Has it all gone to waste?

All the promises we made….

One by one, they vanished just the same…

All the things I still remember

Summers never look the same

Years go by and time just seems to fly

But the memories remain

In the middle of September

We still play out in the rain…

Nothing to lose but everything to gain…

Reflecting now on how things could've been

It was worth it in the end…

Now it all seems so clear

There is nothing left to fear

So we made our way by finding what was real…

Now the days are so long

That summer's moving on…

Reach for something that's already gone…

We knew we had to leave this town

But we never knew when and we never knew how…

We would end up here…the way we are

All the things I still remember

Summers never look the same

Years go by and time just seems to fly….

But the memories remain…

.In the middle of September

We still played out in the rain

Nothing to lose but everything to gain…

Reflecting now on how things could've been

It was worth it in the end….

I realized that I was part of a relationship…that was so, so pure, passionate and unique that I felt blessed to have been a part of it….
What can one do…when he loses love ? :-)
Mope and wait….
Mope and wait….
:-)
Cheerio….

EYESPEAK....

2009-08-21T04:15:00.000-07:00

I keep sitting lost in your thoughts...
I keep asking myself the same questions over and over again...
I wanted to say so much to you...
You are cuter than before :) ...
I want our eyes to do the talking...I want our eyes to communicate our heart's messages...I want us to get lost in each other's eyes...

I just want to keep looking at you...
I want time to freeze...
I do not know what to say and what not to say...
I want you to understand what I cannot say...

My only wish is that you remain mine forever...
I want you by my side in reality...I have dreamt of it enough already...
I just want to lose myself in your eyes....

The moon and all the stars pale in comparison to you...
They reflect your radiance, your glow...
I do not know whether I will ever get this opportunity again...
Nobody has seen tomorrow...
Let us share the path which leads us into the future...
I do not want to have any regrets..
This is what love actually means..

When the eyes speak and the heart listens...

Missing you T :(

SKETCHES....OF AN HOUR GLASS...GRAINS FROM BEYOND THE MEMORY TRAIN..

2009-06-05T13:46:00.000-07:00

My little brother and a sleepy eyed me :) His tummy is the softest pillow in the world :D

In front of the historic Char Minar

All at sea :D , literally and figuratively :D

Sachit, me and Gaurav obviously find a flower vase something to gawk and stare at...because the Loch Ness monster is now extinct :D

Looking out of the window is the cheapest ticket to a theater full of memories and recollections :)

There are times when you want a bigger slice of the pie :D and the world is your stage... That's something (from the left) which Sachit, Usha and I decided to do this year :D

Doing something different for wellllllllllll... the very first time in my life :)

The family (they are friends no more, they are family :D ) that went with me to IBS, Hyderabad.

The most innocent and adorable and the cutest part of my family :D

Arziyaan ................. :)

2009-06-03T12:41:00.000-07:00

I have written all my prayers on my face and have come before you,
What should I ask for ? I think you know what I desire....
My lord, My god.....
My Lord, My Creator

My brain is full of cracks my lord....
Repair it, revitalize it....

I have been created by you, you can erase me, I bow before you...
Repair it, revitalize it.....
Whoever has come and bowed before you,
You have filled them with unbound happiness my Lord...
They came in search of a glass of water and you provided them with the entire river.....
You showered them with gems, you drenched them with the rubies of contentment...
My Lord, My God ......

My brain is full of cracks my lord....
Repair it, revitalize it....

Whoever has come and bowed before you ,
You have filled them with unbound happiness my Lord...
A sweet smell fills our noses....
We become addicted to that heavenly perfume...
Your magic is as smooth as silk...
I am in awe of it....
I became aware of it when I stepped into your alley my lord..
That the perfume was always within me..
I just had to awaken and smell it....

My brain is full of cracks my lord....
Repair it, revitalize it....

I know how to break down and get blown away by the winds of time,
I also know how to recognize your presence...
Give me shelter my lord, I want to stay under your shadow forever...
If you refuse me....I will permanently dissociate and disappear...

My brain is full of cracks my lord....
Repair it, revitalize it....

I have wished for several things,
I have dreamt about many things and tried to accomplish those dreams,
When you came before me my lord, I could not look you in the eyes...
I bowed before you and suddenly...all my dreams were accomplished....

My Lord, My God...

My brain is full of cracks my lord....
Repair it, revitalize it....

Bring my loved one close to me,
Bring the one I love close to my heart...
May the person I love be mine...
May I love that person unto death......

My Lord, My God....

My brain is full of cracks my lord....
Repair it, revitalize it....

To watch the video of Arziyaan : Follow the link by clicking on the star row: ***********

AND...THE OSCAR... I MEAN ZE ABC AWARD GOES TO....

2009-05-30T13:50:00.000-07:00

The award list :

* For Pseudo Intellectual , the bestest girl I know and adore :D . Your blog inspired me to start blogging in the first place :) Thank you :)

* For INsanely sane....surviving qualmless and Pseudo Intellectual :

* For my special "No Mute spectator " :) :

* Finally...for MADS MAD MESS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :

This in my humble capacity, is my appreciation for people who really make blog reading pleasurable :)

CIAO ALL :)

S

2009-05-30T02:44:00.000-07:00

It was when I first saw you....that I really felt good about myself :) You were singing on stage and you looked ever so beautiful with your eyes shining and your hair billowing in the soft breeze... I cannot understand why my heart thumped when I picked up your register which you had forgetfully abandoned in the Electrical Networks lab. I did not have the courage to give it back to you, so I passed it on to my friend who did the honors :)

It was when I saw you dancing on stage during the college festival that I realized how beautiful you really are... I had goosebumps and I could only watch on, my eyes wide apart and my body numb to the world...the feeling was ethereal :)

It was when we first met.... and I was a mess, stammering, blabbering non sense and staring down at my toes....

I still remember the time we spent together.. just the two of us in one of the empty rooms in college, where we talked for hours....where we communicated so much in those lovely snatches of time...

It was when I held your hand to help you climb onto the stage during this college festival.....

It was when you put your head on my shoulder after your dance performance telling me that you are so nervous... It was when you blushed when I congratulated you for winning :)

It was when I gave you a rose with a broken stem :D before we went on stage to host an event together :)

It was the hour we spent outside our classes after bunking our lectures :)

It was the concern I felt when you left for home so very late that one night

It is what I feel when whenever we meet......

Sigh.... Tis can never be :)

Just wanted you to know S :)

I am missing you and I care about you :)

HEART ACHE............. :(

2009-05-29T16:39:00.000-07:00

This post has been written just to let out my bottled up emotions out .... cause today , the long night cum dawn of the 29th of May is f***ing my brains out :(

I do not not what to do :(

I have written one post already ...... :(

I feel terrified...for an unknown reason, I am scared beyond words, I am so very restless, I cannot lie down and go to sleep :( I just cannot close my eyes peacefully....even death would be welcome :(

I am missing you J..... I am really missing you a lot :( .. I messaged you yesterday night but you did not reply... I so so want to meet you again and make you laugh over the cup of coffee we promised ourselves 3 years ago. I remember that you once asked me to have a cuppa@CCD, but due to unavoidable circumstances I could not join you. I promise you that we will have a cup soon in each other's company...All the same I am missing you so very much.. I hope that you are smiling girl :) Deja Vu' :)

I am thinking about you Sitanshu. I am thinking about the cricket we played outside your house, the times when we solved those mock IIT papers at each other's houses, am thinking about the time I watched Dil Chahta Hai at your house and felt that our friendship could last the apocolypse, I am missing the way you used to end up outside my house on your Activa and call out to me from under my window, I am missing the times when we used to meet up during the morning assemblies, I am shedding tears on remembering the one time when you landed up at my house to teach my brother on the eve of his maths paper even though it was pouring cats and dogs, I am looking at the diary you gifted me and I cannot control my sobs :( You mean everything and a lot to me brother..... I am missing you so very much :( I cannot wait to see you again :(

I am thinking about you F, you are not picking up the phone...Are you ill, are you unwell ?? Has your mood gotten better ?? Missing you dear :( Wanna meet up with you as soon as possible.. and give you the hug I should have given previously :) I hope that the sweet girl is smiling :)

I am thinking about you too S, why are you so sweet to me ? I think ,we both know that we do not have a path in front of us which we can cross together.. Still, I care about you a lot :) am missing you horribly as well :( although I keep seeing you from time to time :)

Missing you Dad, am really horribly missing you :) Please come back soon and scold me... I want you to beat me up :) but please sit down and laugh with me while watching the news channels together.... Missing you dad :( I wanna hug you as soon as you come..Do not worry...Everything will be fine :)

I am missing you Usha, your big brother needs to see you smile everyday... and that is not happening :(

Sorry for imposing this on you people :( I am feeling very lonely and sad :( I do not know what to do :(

This post lifted some grief of my chest for the time being.......

SHE...

2009-05-29T12:07:00.000-07:00

Why cant I just forget her ?? I just cannot seem to get over her :( I try hard to get away, start over afresh...but then I realize...that I just love her too much...After a fight, my mind tells me to break off contact for 5 months, my heart tells me to stop being foolish because it knows that my sabbatical will not last 5 minutes :(

I get jealous when she mentions her crush, when she goes out with other guys and has a good time... I honestly admit it... I am not possessive nor am I a dog in the manger...Since she is not mine, I do not have any reason to be jealous or feel irritated when she talks about the lovely time that she spent . Sigh ! I guess she would have to be in my shoes to feel what happens...It is like a little pin prick inside my heart .... :( I just cannot help it... It is involuntary... I know other people have more of a right to be with her and I am the least worthy among them all...but still... I hope and I hope ....

I am so in love ...the love outlasts the pain... She tells me to let go, be selfish, harbor no hopes, "try to learn", compartmentalize and not care so much for her :(
I do not want to regret and tell myself on my deathbed that I could have given her more love and care than I am presently giving her right now :) If you do not do all the above mentioned things when you meet the love of your life, then when in hell are you going to do it ??
I know that she is the one.....Sigh...It gets so hard and lonely when she is sad or behaving brusquely with me for any reason :( I love her so very much.... I always want to see her happy... I want her to know that whatever happens... I will always be there...and I want her to look inside her heart...She might listen to it and she might also come to know about the things she does which hurt me the most...foremost of them being "no hugs" *wry smile*

Sigh ! sometimes... I wish she was mine....sometimes I wish she was mine.... :(
What can i say ? I just love her so much :( and nothing can change it...She is the most beautiful person in the world for me :) I wish she knew what she means to me... I just wish.... :(

I AM........ SO VERY SORRY :(

2009-05-27T14:28:00.000-07:00

This post is dedicated to the author of INsanely Sane...Surviving qualmless ,to my adorable T and friend Sitanshu :D

When the wind often blows from the lime trees to the brick walls,
And I am on the move...alone ...with music as my companion...
There are times when I feel that I have not done justice to someone's heart walls...
The walls which need to be strengthened by an understanding, a fusion....

For there are times after my wet hair has dried and I am nibbling on biscuit crusts,
Someone's thought knocks at my memory bank, someone calls out to me....
Someone asks me to know them for what they are, someone asks me to justify their trust,
I know I have partied with Blunder and Heartlessness, my two least favorite enemies...

From accusations that I know will hurt my most precious love,
From bitter words that I know will create a rift between us....
I have drawn an inner strength that sets me free like a dove,
A desire to acknowledge that someone who rides my heart's bus....

Here I fall before you on my knees..and pour out my heart with it's many fractions...
And acknowledge that you have been always the one to hold me when I am shaking...
You have always been patient, though hurt, loving though pained by my actions...
I have been the heartless doubter, the one who has always suspected your genuine feelings..

I am so sorry, my life, my adorable one...I cringe when I look back into the past...
I miss you my friend, the one who always has a smile and words of encouragement to lend,
I love my angel, I respect you my friend and I adore you my brother..who is with me steadfast...
Without the love I get from all of you...my life would truly reach a sad end.....

THE WORLD IS ROUND ... FOR PEOPLE WITH BALLS :D

2009-05-24T13:30:00.000-07:00

Welcome :D Let me roll out a pink carpet for all of you, my readers :D Since the world has gone alarmingly metro sexual, I figured out that pink would be the order of the day... Let me introduce myself :) My name is Carrot....
No funny jokes about the name :) It has been given to me by someone very special. Thanks a ton T :) Do NOT ask me what she was thinking of ,while giving me this vegetative name..According to me,I think that I am tall, I do go orange-ish red when people ask me about my devil like thick eyebrows and I am physically handsomely endowed ( I do not know if you got this one :D )...

Anyway....

Today I am talking about balls...errr.... I mean people with balls.... errr.. I mean people who make a living out of balls....ummmm ...people who play with balls :D

I am talking about, the funny side of Cricket and Football :D

The IPL Season 2 just ended...and I literally mean just...am blogging 4 hours after it did :) Congratulations Deccan Chargers :D though you broke mine and T's heart together today :)

I was laughing my head off when I saw VVS Laxman grinning broadly and coming up to receive his winner's medal..What did he do during the whole tournament ?? Play in two games and fail miserably in both of them :D In fact the Deccan Chargers found more stability in their line up after resting him. All he did for the remainder of the tournament was sit on the grass in their dug out ( he was not even offered bench space ) and wrap himself up as snugly as he could in a blue blanket. Yeah he did stand next to Gilchrist during the prize distribution and grin broadly like a father who has just heard his new born child say "IPOD " :)

RP Singh, the purple cap winner was grinning broadly from his ear to his oily hair as he went up on stage to receive the purple-gold cap... During his entire duration of stay on the podium, he was like a man who does not know what to do with a porno magazine that has been forced into his hand :D
He wore the decorative cap approximately 7 times and took it off each time realizing his foolishness and grinning sheepishly. Yet he repeated this act over and over again...forcing me and Dad to double over with laughter and Mom to stare at us with the "Mad men, I tell you " look :)

Vijay Mallaya was devasted as he slowly drained one beer bottle after another and with moist eyes fled to Monaco to cheer his Force India F1 team on,after hugging Katrina Kaif for the trillionth time in the tournament. He left his entire crate of beer to Anil Kumble who chased Robin Utthappa around the park, flinging one bottle after another at his head. It was Mark Boucher who got Kumble to calm down and sneakily fled with the entire crate after bribing RP Singh with a bottle, who was so happy that he started twirling his shirt around which hit Andrew Symonds in the face. Symonds then chased RP Singh around the park in what was mistaken to be a victory lap by the fans many of whom swore that they heard Symonds bellowing a victory chant which sounded like "Maaki" or "Monkey".....

Cricket is a funny game....Men with sticks hit balls chased around by people who aim to hit the sticks or catch the ball :D It truly is a "manly" game :D ,although women are catching up, it will always retain it's mannish tinge :D Everybody has a ball...errr...I mean a good time :)

Balling up errr... I mean moving on to football...

Didier "Dog bra" errr... I am sorry ,Drogba, has recieved an honory doctorate from the UNIVERSITY OF DIVING AND MOANING, somewhere on the planet Pluto... I mean the man was an absolute joke against Barcelona in the CHAMPIONS LEAGUE semifinal...and his tirade consisting of 'F' words staring directly into the camera was a matter of deep shame to the football community. It was later learnt that he got a call the very next day from the BJP who said that they wanted him to be their star campaigner and dole out hate speeches :D

Liverpool manager Rafa Benitez was seen dancing inside Anfield with his players. When asked about the reason ,he simply stated that Manchester United were about to lose Tevez to him. Suddenly there was a hail of sticky chewing gum pellets many of which hit Rafa on the face. It was later learnt that Sir Alex Fergusson was firing them from above the stadium in his hot air balloon :D

That will be all for a mild dose of the laughing gas since this was the introductory post...Get ready for a serious fart the next time :D

CARROT'S AWAY :D

MANCHESTER "UNITED" AT LAST...........................

2009-05-22T06:40:00.000-07:00

Manchester United sealed a third successive Premier League title by getting the point they needed against Arsenal - but the Old Trafford celebrations only started after an afternoon gripped by tension.

Sir Alex Ferguson's side knew a draw would ensure they equalled Liverpool's long-time record of 18 titles, but Arsenal ensured they did not earn their prize without a fight.

Robin van Persie and Cesc Fabregas both wasted opportunities to drag the title race into its final week and leave United with more work to do at Hull City on the last day of the season as nerves jangled in the closing stages.

But United's defence, so often the bedrock of their success this season, delivered another clean sheet when Ferguson needed it most and Old Trafford erupted in ecstasy at the final whistle as an 11th Premier League success was confirmed.

Old Trafford title win extra special - Rooney

Wayne Rooney missed United's best chance with a first-half header, and there was an intriguing cameo when Old Trafford voiced its resounding disapproval when the popular Carlos Tevez was substituted in what could prove to be his final home appearance.

But nothing could overshadow United's achievement - or the joy of players, fans and management - as the presentations were made after the final whistle with club captain Gary Neville lifting the Barclays Premier League trophy.

United saw off a stirring challenge from an improving Liverpool this season to once again set the standards their rivals must meet, despite a stumble when defeats against Rafael Benitez's side and Fulham threatened to undermine their challenge.

And as so often during this campaign, United got the result they needed when not at their most fluent, with the industry of Darren Fletcher and the defensive solidity of Nemanja Vidic taking centre stage as Arsenal kept Rooney and Cristiano Ronaldo on the margins.

More to come from young side - Giggs

United's squad were introduced individually as the presentations began, but the biggest ovation of all was reserved for Ferguson, whose hunger, drive and desire have again been the inspiration for this triumph.

And as the pyrotechnics flashed around Old Trafford, Ferguson could start the preparations for further glory as he attempts to make United the first club to successfully defend the Champions League when they meet Barcelona in the final in Rome.

Tevez's spectacular equaliser at Wigan earned him a starting place ahead of Dimitar Berbatov - with Ferguson clearly unmoved by continued speculation surrounding the Argentine's future.

Andrey Arshavin was restored to Arsenal's side after illness, and he saw plenty of possession in a first 45 minutes that saw Arsene Wenger's side acquit themselves far better than when the pressure was on in the recent Champions League semi-final against United.

The Russian provided an inviting cross for Van Persie after 13 minutes, but he headed off target with United's defence unlocked.

United's response was a Rooney header from John O'Shea's cross four minutes later. He should have at least tested Arsenal keeper Lukasz Fabianski, but directed a low header just wide.

Arsenal had a foothold in the game without putting United's defence under concerted pressure, but there was enough on show to subdue the atmosphere of anticipation inside Old Trafford.

United had one final opportunity as the interval approached, but Ryan Giggs, who would later collect his 11th Premier League title medal, shot well over the top after good work on the left flank by Rooney.

Van Persie had already been booked for a reckless challenge on Ronaldo, and he was fortunate to escape with a lecture from referee Mike Dean early in the second half for another poor tackle, this time on Patrice Evra.

United had struggled to create clear-cut opportunities, but Fabianski had to be alert on the hour to block Tevez, with Ronaldo firing the loose ball yards over the bar.

It was the final contribution for Tevez, who was replaced by Ji-Sung Park. Ferguson's decision was not well received by Old Trafford, in fact it was met with open derision as the popular striker made his way to the touchline.

Tevez milked the situation for all it was worth, waving to all sides of the ground in apparent farewell - going a step further by acknowledging the fans after taking his place on the bench.

Ronaldo thought he had scored the goal that rubber-stamped the title with 12 minutes left, but his 20-yard angled free-kick dipped just wide with Fabianski beaten.

We did it the hard way - Carrick

Fabregas almost stunned Old Trafford with seven minutes left and the clock ticking down towards the title triumph. He found space inside the penalty area but, to widespread relief from the home support, could only find the side-netting.

Van Persie then shot straight at Van der Sar as United looked to have settled for the stalemate that would see them retain their crown.

The Dutch striker gave Old Trafford one final scare when his free-kick was bravely blocked by Michael Carrick.

Seconds later, referee Dean sounded the final whistle and United were crowned champions again.

Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson:
"The great challenge now is to try to win it next year because that would be something special.

"A 19th league title would give us a special place in the club's history."
Man Utd reaction in full

Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger:
"United are worthy champions. They did well in every single competition and that is very difficult.

Defensive record the difference - Wenger

"It was a very interesting championship. I think United won it because they got more points at home than any of the other teams in the top four.

"Our ambition was to win the game. United were very cautious, and we did not find an opening.

"We lacked sharpness and quality in the final third but overall we dominated the game.

"United's strength is to defend well and that is what they did today."

Details courtesy : BBC Sports

*************************************************************************************

I was delirious, maddened beyond happy comprehension.... If there were any active volcanoes present anywhere in the vicinity of Mumbai , I would have bound up all the horrible Liverpool and Chelsea fans (who have been nothing short of lice in my hair for the past 10 months trying to suck my blood and brand me with a red hot iron proclaiming that Liverpool/Chelsea were going to win the Premier League this time) and flung them into the boiling hot lava..................

Anyway, I am the one laughing the loudest and grinning the widest at the end.... Liverpool fans end up being Livery Livered, The Blues end up drinking Dormex and the Gunners finish with a cannon poking up their a**es and a bazooka pointing up Arsene Wenger's backside :) I do not hold anything against these fine teams but their "loyal" fans who whip my backside everyday in the Lecture halls whenever Manchester United slips up :) Be at peace brothers...while I rob the candy store... CIAO all...

UPDATES

2009-05-14T14:38:00.000-07:00

I am supremely fit and agile after quite a long time :) If scoring goals and running continuously for about 2 hours on a football pitch without tiring is not a proof of the qualities I mentioned, then I am afraid that Laloo Prasad Yadav has joined the BJP.

Manchester United are going to Rome... I cannot stop grinning from ear to ear... The preachers and practicers of democratic football have triumphed and the communist practicers ie Chelsea (who else ) have been smashed out of the tournament by Barcelona :) Double joy :)

I was asked out by this certain girl this week :) who suggested that we 'visit a mall' . A mall on a first date ???? The very thought was enough to make me imagine that the Kolkata Knight Riders will be reaching this year's final :) So, I politely declined :)

Annnnnnnnd my exams are starting from the 19th

I have to run :) Scold me people !!! for not studying :)

COCKTAIL.....

2009-05-10T03:11:00.000-07:00

Blood..flowing thicker than custard in my veins.......
Power coursing larger than the Andromeda through my body....
Courage moving greater than the Pacific into my heart
Tears gushing faster than a tornado from my eyes....

I have written a few metaphorical comparisons for an unknown reason.....

These are difficult times....

These are difficult days....

You give grace in a world that doesn't sleep at all...
You give me grace in a place that I have never been to before...
That is why I will never be alone....

Precision, brilliance at the time of need.... the strength to extract that extra bit and reach the heavenly stage to prove yourself once again ......

When gold turns to brass and the tiger loses its speed and skill......when riches turn to dust and the warriors are defused and poisoned....

When a stained finger does not require washing...when a single act of participation can raise a million hearts and retract the fingers of blame...When a stained finger..brings a smile and not a frown to the bearers of a great nation....

OVER YOU................ WHAT ABOUT NOW ???

2009-05-10T02:51:00.000-07:00

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Shadows fill an empty heart
As love is fading,
From all the things that we are
But are not saying.
Can we see beyond the scars
And make it to the dawn?

Change the colors of the sky.
And open up to
The ways you made me feel alive,
The ways I loved you.
For all the things that never died,
To make it through the night,
Love will find you.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?

The sun is breaking in your eyes
To start a new day.
This broken heart can still survive
With a touch of your grace.
Shadows fade into the light.
I am by your side,
Where love will find you.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love, it never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?

Now that we're here,
Now that we've come this far,
Just hold on.
There is nothing to fear,
For I am right beside you.
For all my life,
I am yours.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
Baby, before it's too late,
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?

HYDERABAD BLUES, MOONS, GOONS AND TOONS.....

2009-05-04T02:35:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone, a big hug to N and a bigger hug to T :) ....... I am back from Hyderabad :) The jewel of the Deccan.... and boy ...do I have loads to tell you :) I was selected for the Young Achiever's Program 2009 organised by IBS Hyderabad and was among the top 200 in this nationwide talent hunt... Before you think that I am a nerd with nothing better to do .... let me tell you that the exam was given by about some thousands of students who had nothing better to do on a Sunday morning than solve a paper on aptitude, general knowledge and English before the phenomenon known as the IPL started.

It was sweltering hot in Hyderabad...... and I literally survived on 7 UP and Slice..... In fact I used to pass out aerated carbonated piss during my nightly visits to the toilet... so high was my soft drink intake :)

The mornings at IBS used to be fun. We had to wake up and breakfast before 9:30 am. Our lazy Mumbai group consisting of

from left to right : Harshit, Pushkar and me, found it extremely difficult to adapt to the surroundings. We felt like a slowly diminishing species of dinosaurs trapped inside a world of punctual golden langurs who were always hopping on their tails to reach the lectures as punctually as possible.

I used to wake up somehow by 9:00 am , somehow lurch to Pushkar's door and bang the daylights out of it. Pushkar used to stumble to the door, pull it open and utter his famous dialog "Yaar, thoda so lete hain, do boond paani pila de", pull his towel ( yes his towel and not his blanket) over his head and fall asleep again......

We used to somehow awaken him, rush to the breakfast hall by 9:20 , grab ourselves a bite or two and speed off to our lecture hall :)

Will let you in on more about the fascinating trip tomorrow as I have to set out on some urgent work.....Sorry for leaving you midships :) CIAO

It's been .... a 100 HTML coded text cocoons full of joy :)

2009-04-13T06:38:00.000-07:00

It's that feeling which is so often described as indescribable.... I ll give you a slight hint .......

And Michael Clarke, the blonde bombshell from South Australia has scored his first hundred against India on Indian soil... What a moment !!! What a player !!!

And Cristiano Ronaldo has hit the ground running.... When you get such a ball, of such high quality inside the 6 yard box, you have no other choice....that ball had "hit me" written all over it.. He did not place it...he put his foot through it...he smashed it and it stayed hit...because sometimes you know that today I have to go out and get myself a hundred and Cristiano's has done exactly that...A 100 for himself and a hundred priceless goals for Manchester United........

Without boring all of you any further :) I ll just say it... a 100 posts... And I am not proud of it at all :) surprised ??? It is because I temporarily retired from blogging in the interim otherwise I would have been very close to the 150 mark by now... I saw a dearth of topics and I could not blog just for the sake of it...so a sabbatical was in order and I am glad to say that I am back refreshed.

One of the biggest advantages of having girls as your friends is that..... your sixth sense can go for an extended vacation to Idaho. Girls have these magical sixth, seventh , eighth, ,nine....errrr... infinite senses which they put to severely good use. Girls also attach importance to several things of avoidable importance such the plastic Slice bottles which they use to carry water in. One Ms S forgot her bottle, went half the way home and then realised that she was missing the bottle which held the magical elixir. I was called up and told to hunt it down and preserve it. When I did return it to her, her entire face lit up and she smiled and beamed widely..... So much happiness for something which can easily replaced with a Fanta bottle :) Beyond my comprehension :)

What do I look for in girls ??? What attracts me to the beautiful and fairer+stronger sex ?? It all lies in the eyes and the smile... I look for depth and a complete reflection of the girl's inner self in the eyes. The eyes are a give away about one's character and they are indirectly connected with the smile. If the smile reaches the eyes, breaches the pupils like a ship gently touching the shore creating little wavelets of warmth then there is seldom anything lovelier...... When girls smile...the feeling is indescribable and if you have ever made a girl smile the moment is truly treasureable. I believe that if I am unemployed and homeless in the near future ( looking at the recent recession hit market, it is a strong possibility :) ) , I can make a living out of making girls smile..... it would be rewarding and eternally satisfying...

I have seen lots and hundreds of girls smiling... ( contrary to some people's belief that I have not seen many girls ) but only two have taken my breath away and I literally mean it ( I was not clutching at my throat and gripping the sides of a table in the throes of suffocated death :) ) These smiles made me stop breathing for a moment just to admire their sheer beauty. It appeared as if breathing would disturb the beautiful moment... One smile belongs to my Mom... My mother is beautiful and she has an amazing smile...she smiles and the world lights up for me dispelling all my tensions and pressures for a brief period. I try about almost everything possible to make her laugh as often as possible which includes me approaching her in my bathing towel and pleading with her to bathe me because I feel that I look fairer when she scrubs all my dirt off :) . The other smile belongs to this certain Ms T. Now her smile...FLATTENS me.... She holes my liner and makes me believe that angels and fairies exist in reality. I would sell myself to make her smile :) My gimmicks to make her smile include reading snatches of text from medical tablet strips abruptly between conversations ( a miserable failure :( ) and cracking horrible and lame jokes at frequent intervals. Hey T.. if you are reading this... I know you must be smiling, right ??? Yup, I can already see those beautiful lips curving into the most stunning smile I have ever seen :)

It is clear the I am missing someone.... Shucks... just when I thought that my 100 th post would be about the colour of LK Advani's underpants..... I am confused... I am afraid to sing JAI HO and apprehensive about rendering BHAI HO.... I am bewildered about Varun Gandhi's speech which I wholeheartedly mistook to be a delivery from a monkey king asking his primate subjects to learn salsa..... I am half expecting Advani to come out with a statement "I do the cha cha like a sissy girl" :) I have gone bonkers :) raving mad... a 100 posts needs celebration.... somebody open a bottle of Fanta apple.. Go ...bite :) CIAO

Requiem for a dream, infestation of the brain for satisfaction.............

2009-04-12T01:41:00.000-07:00

His steps were slow and unwavering. as he reached his destination, an abandoned cottage shaped shed, he paused for a while and sniffed the dusk air..There was still some time left..He occupied a bench and revelled in the fading light..Thoughts were racing like a dog with a burnt tail through his head. His hands reached up to scratch his chin and cheeks... His fingers met with resistance provided by his facial hair. It had been a long time since he had shaved. A trickle of blood coursed down his jaw and splattered onto his shorts. Distracted he looked down to see his hands...Bloodstained........His eye right eye was swollen, the lid bloody and the pupil barely recognizable.....

The hand that had caused the injury was still lying at his feet. Severed.... the lifeless fingers seemed to beckon... Seething he kicked the lifeless hand away.....Power...was intoxicating....Liquor like addiction rather...Momentary discern caused by the firefly caused him to stop and notice it through his good eye..... Violence was supreme... the essence of crushing something so fragile and consuming it.... The raw hunger was insatiable... transcending beyond comprehension...stretching out of the reach of logic and confinement of one's passion to burst free.

The moon seemed to be hesitant. Pity was self loathing and the mystical was rampant. The aura was full of energy and the air was charged with electricity........

Requiem for a dream, infestation of the brain for satisfaction.............

The moon revealed itself......

The transformation was underway.... Man gave way to the untamed....Reasoning , logic and care gave way to passion , unbridled hunger and animal instinct.....

The werewolf was an embodiment of man's will to break free, explore unprecedented horizons and howl out it's rebellious message to the world....

With a swish of the tail, he bounded out of the shed and disappeared into the night...

[ NOTE : Images for representational purposes only ]

MY SECOND LIFE AND MY EXTENDED FAMILY......

2009-03-26T07:05:00.000-07:00

ZEPHYR 2009 is finally over and I am feeling the pangs of loss....I am missing the atmosphere of room number A -316 and every time I pass the door to our cell, I turn out of instinct and bump into the locked door :) It has become a ritual over the past 2 weeks to wistfully smile and continue up the stairs and enter my lecture room for a change :)

What can I say about my family ??????

About some of the best friends I have made over a period of three months......

About people, whom I know will have my back covered, will support me, who will never forget what we shared, who will laugh at my lousy imitations and who will always be a phone call away....

I will get down to thanking all my friends who made me breathe during the past three months....

Abhishek Patil : I have found a brother in you. Thank you so so much for advising me on how to go about my studies, thank you for telling me that girls are not worth all the pain we guys go through even though you are screwed up yourself and both of us are floating on the same boat :) .. Thank you for all those memorable sponsorship trips,where we covered the length and breadth of Mumbai and I observed your "lucrative offers" :) Thank you for the double trip to Siddhivinayak and the introduction to Bhajji Pav :) Love you brother, I will be there for you always :) Just return the shorts which you borrowed from me :)

Kameshwar K Kaza (extreme left) : Man, you have all my respect and all my admiration...How could you stay so calm and focussed even in pressure cooker situations? You rarely lost your cool, you always encouraged us, indulged us and made sure that we were like one big family. Zephyr 2009 was more 'we' than 'us' and a majority of the credit goes to you for achieving it.
Thank you for educating me on sponsorships....you are my guru and I am forever indebted :) Thank you for letting me be your main anchor and telling me that "The stage is all yours, go handle it !!! "...you will never know how much confidence these words infused in me...Thank you for saving my ass on numerous occasions and being there when I wanted you to save it :) I have so much to say but I am running short of words..you are are the coolest Cultural Secretary our college has ever produced..... period :) A big hug for my elder brother :)

Rakesh Teja : (extreme right) You taught me how not to take out my anger on people who have nothing to do with it. Its a valuable lesson and I have taken it to heart. You my brother, are a focussed genius :) Thank you for lending us your laptop on our sponsorship trips, thank you for all the nights that you stayed up and made sure that our flexes, banners, walls, posters and shirts echo with the true spirit of Zephyr. I have nothing but respect and love for the most creative person in the entire Zephyr team.... We want you for this year as well (Clear your 4th year..... and give us an appointment for next year :) )

Saurabh Joshi (The sweaty guy with the dhol :) ) : My most passionate friend and brother in the entire Zephyr team. You have spent every nerve, sinew, blood droplet and ounce of fat in your body to take Zephyr to new heights. I can actually call you my Zephyr mentor because life at Zephyr started with knowing you :) Thank you for being so patient with an upstart and volatile person like me :) Dont worry brother, we will nurture the plant which you so carefully planted. Your words will always be with me :) We will definitely have Euphoria on stage next year, that is my promise and I will remember your 2 golden words for a long time to come "MC ":)

Krithiga AKA Amma : She is the most adorable person I came across in the Zephyr team...She is my second mother :) and one of most warmest individuals around. Thank you for caring about me, listening to all my problems (mostly love related ones ) Thank you for bearing with the stubborn and rude SOB that I am :) Thank you for flashing that warm smile even in the face of adversity. It gave me so much courage at times. You will go places my second Mom...Do not forget to call me to your wedding :) Beat your husband up as regularly as you can :) and try to miss me ...because I will miss you a lot..You are truly my heroine for Zephyr 2009 because you worked your socks off and gave it everything that you have. You have my respect for that...Shine in life and keep smiling :)

Shruti Pathak (extreme left) : You are the most energetic member of our group, or rather should I say, the boy of our group :) Thank you for the double tiffins :) They were yummy and always satisfied me to the core :) Thank you for sharing so much with me, for all the appointments that you fixed, for all the "You are looking very pretty" times that we shared :) ,for all the "it's ok" sentences that you passed on....Thank you for being you, bubbly.....and smiling (with the occasional headaches and mood swings :) ) . Take care Shruti and keep smiling that warm smile :)

Usha AKA Toto :) (to my left) : Where do I begin about my youngest sister?? :) The baby of our group :) One look at her told me that I wanted to adopt her as my younger sister. She is cute, bubbly, adorable, warm, gullible and everything that one wants a sister to be...Thank you for those discussions about love :) about our love interests, our likes, dislikes and basically thank you for standing by me throughout Zephyr :) It really meant a lot to me....and I ll have you know that your elder brother will always be with you, protecting you and laughing with you :) Work hard this time and we will enjoy another Zephyr together :)

Rohit Pant ( Squatting down,left) : The Casanova and playboy :) The guy who told me that there were some girls out there who liked me :) (And I thought it was a distant dream, one that would be fulfilled in another billion years). You have everything going for you brother, you are smart, confident and hardworking. Just stay focussed and you will shine brilliantly :) Thank you for telling me that I need to dilute my intense look :) Will miss you brother :)

Nitesh Jha (Squatting down,right) : Our new cultural secretary :) Focussed, no non sense and determined. You have all my support for this time brother. Together we will make Zephyr, a force to reckon with. Thank you for coloring the toilet basins red with your pan masala eruptions and rendering "gulabi aankhen" wonderfully ,even with your mouth full of errr....things :)

Shomik Dasgupta (standing, extreme right) : Fuck you , you professional scoundrel :) You deserve a big hug and lots of admiration. You certainly have won mine, because you handled yourself with dignity and never got irked even though I made fun of you countlessly before our team mates. You are truly a patient individual and the amount and quality of work that you put in ,deserves plaudits. I may curse you on your face brother :) but I am always there for you and I know that I can trust you with my life... You are truly one of my best friends...Please take care of me :) I need your support and guidance and I hope that you do brilliantly in the near future :)

Rakesh Kamath (To the left of Shomik) : You really are a proper gentleman Rakesh :) Calm, proper, composed, disciplined and always good humored. It really was a pleasure working with you right from our EESA times :) Thank you for being the only guy besides Kaza and Joshi whom I haven't fought with in the Zephyr Cell. Take care brother :) You have a bright future ahead of you :)

Rahul Pathak (To the left of Rakesh) : You really are a funny man :) You can be so damn witty even without trying to..... Thank you for all the laughs that you provided us with, thank you for selflessly helping out, working hard, keeping us awake at night and being an elder brother for us third year students :) Will miss you bhai :)

Manas Agarwal (Extreme left) : You have to work hard this year brother, am entrusting you with the job which Teja has so splendidly performed. You have big boots to fill. But knowing your dedication and sincerity towards the job at hand, I think you will do a fair job :) Thank you for those countless Rs 100 loans ( I think I still owe you 100 bucks, but then what's money between friends ??? :) ). You are one of my oldest friends and I think I need not say anymore :)

Gourav Agarwal (Centre) : What do I need to say?? :) About you my brother :) I have shared countless dreams with you :) I will not say much now. You are a gem...Dont lose yourself. Let us work together and touch the stars next year.....I will write a book about you then...For now..continue to be one of my best friends :)

For Sonali, Sandesh, Mithun ,Yogesh ,Anuj and Kushal...........I do not have have your pics :( ....I promise to put them up as soon as I get my hands on them.... Nevertheless....

Sonali : The ultimate ultrasonic generator :) Thank you for being so patient with me and thank you for the numerous and countless appointments that you fixed up :) Looking forward to next year :)

Sandesh : Our able treasurer :) You worked really hard man. Your dedication is unmatched and the amount of work that you have done is laudable... "Bol bol why did you ditch me ???" :). Will miss you brother :) Can you stay back and help us with the cheques and sponsorships next year as well ??? :) You can still stamp the Zephyr IDS with same love and care you used this time :) All the best for your future brother :)

Mithun : You dastardly Liverpool fan :) You are hilarious brother....Looking forward to Zulu bars and intense looks the next year as well...Thank you for all those fun times...and the crap jokes :) WIll never forget them....You have a heart of gold :) Keep it :)

Anuj : Our house keeping incharge :) Kuchch mangaya hai kya ??? :) Looking forward to continuing our friendship and the Zephyr bond brother :)

Kushal : Another guy who worked his socks off...thank you for all the hard work that you put in....really appreciate your dedication and focucs :)

Yogesh : Great job with the website dude :) Need you next year as well :) Be prepared to scrub your ass :) and btw.... Thanks for the OSHO clip :)

ANNNNNDDDDDD I would like to thank my hosting team.....

Anisha Mule : (BTW that is me yakking away during the debate :) ) You deserve all my attention Anisha. Thank you for being so sweet and understanding. I still feel so guilty about the countless number of times that I ditched you :) but then we managed to win the Debate this time around. I am proud of you :) We will try to win again next year as well :) and as for your hosting abilities :) there is nobody I would have liked to host MnM other than you cause seeing you there on stage comforted me :) You have improved by leaps and bounds and you really are a lovely individual...warm, funny :) , caring and fun to be with :) Stay this way....always :) and I promise you that there will be no further ditching and that I will always talk to you after removing both my earphones :)

Bageshree : I have always taken you for granted :) and told you to host events at the drop of a hat without prior information :) Thank you for being so sporting and taking up the challenge. You have done admirably well this year. You have improved consistently with each outing and I am very proud of you :) You are all ready for center stage next year :) Just remember to "lend me your ears" :)

Sonia Kulkarni : Last but not the least :) I come up with the ultimate beauty and the beast pic (I really am looking like an ugly vampire :) ) Hmmm... where can I start about you Sonia ?? :) I never quite remember how our friendship started but I treasure it. You dance fabulously well, you are our Miss Zephyr, you are improving with your hosting duties :) and your nervousness is slowly slipping away :) Stay focussed towards your GRE and your little black box full of words (I feel tempted to steal it :) ) and keep smiling...you know that you have a priceless and lovely smile, right ?? :) Try to "play the football" :) and stay the lovely individual that you are... Thank you for trying to make me dance (I failed miserably though :) ) ....Looking forward to good times ahead :)...You are a multi talented individual...you are bound to shine :)

At the end of it all :) A big, warm thank you to all the above mentioned people :) Its been one heck of a ride and I think that all of us have come out winners :) Feeling emotional right now :) Too many memories :) God bless all of you ... Feel proud because we all are......ZEPHYRITES :)

I AM BORN....AGAIN :)

2009-03-15T01:38:00.000-07:00

The time has now come to decide whether I am an utter fool or a fool who is utterly ridiculous. I am distracted to say the least. The past plays a very important part in my life and I am desperate to zone myself out of my historically mad annals. I am feeling childish again and my heart is throbbing with a sense of adventure and excitement that I had known several years back.

It's that old familiar feeling and I love it. I am impatient and befuddled all at once. I am looking forward to some particular time slices and I am warming myself up to the knowledge that I am falling down a deep well once more.

I am 3 posts away from a 100. Time has flown and I cannot help but look back in fondness upon my work. There are some great memories involved and I am nostalgic for more reasons than one :)

Until I have some fresh things to say.... I think that I will lie back and grab myself a sandwich or two :) Cheerz :)

DROPS OF JUPITER.....DID SHE CATCH SOME ?

2009-02-23T01:58:00.000-08:00

Now that shes back in the atmosphere
With drops of Jupiter in her hair,
She acts like summer and walks like rain.
Reminds me that there is time to change,
Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like June.

Tell me did you sail across the sun?
Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated?

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star?
One without a permanent scar?
And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there?

Now that shes back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation,
She checks out Mozart while she does Tae-Bo
Reminds me that theres time to grow.

Now that shes back in the atmosphere
I am afraid that she might think of me as plain old Jane
Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet?
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day?
And head back to the milky way?
And tell me, did Venus blow your mind ?
Was it everything you wanted to find?
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there ?

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken ?
Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you are wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone
conversation ?
The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet?
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back toward the milky way?

I am missing a lot, I am missing a glowing heart. A glowing heart feels so warm, so right :). The world has both love and hate present in abundance. AR Rahman chose love. That is why he won a double gold. The man is a genius. He has sailed across the sun and skimmed the milky way, bringing the dreams of a hundred billion people to life. Congratulations sir....I have very few words left to say......Congratulations to Gulzar and Resul as well...you guys have made us proud to be a viewing and listening audience :) of Hindi music.

Will be back with our recently concluded cyclothon.....it rocked !!!

CARE AND ........................ JUST FEEL WHAT IT FEELS LIKE :)

2009-02-11T09:53:00.000-08:00

The essence of caring for someone stems from practice and small incidents. It is only when something happens to someone, do we realize that we care about them....we realize that our heart strings hurt when tugged in an unfamiliar direction. I feel that caring about someone is akin to a puppet show..... Every part of you is like a puppet and some damn puppet master seems to be controlling your arm flaps,your knee jerks and your pelvic thrusts....

Why do we care ??? Why cannot everyone be selfish and care about his or her own well being?? It is because we have the ability to love, the ability to share and the excuse.... "I just want to see him/her happy" :) What happiness do we get out of seeing other people's joy ?? Its that familiar swelling in the heart. The emotion that chokes your throat... It cannot be explained.

The actual dichotomy of caring about someone is very confusing. On one hand if the person cares for you too, it is the best thing in the world, it is a dreamland, a euphoric vista. On the other hand if the caring is one sided...then obviously there is considerable pain involved......

Hey....that's right...you...I am talking to the one I care about...Do I have your attention ?? Good :)... You know your every breath is like the air I breath in :) Your every tear is like a stake going through my heart. When you are happy, there is nothing in the world that can shove me down... I am full of life when you are at peace. Your laughter is my medicine. Your presence is my driving force. Your pain is hell for me, through and through... Do I have to explain how my heart beats for your eyes, how I crave to see you smile...ohhhh that smile :) Do I have to cut open my chest to show you that you are the perfect woman....You are perfect.... You are the acme... You are my Miranda....

Have you, my reader...cared for someone ?? You will understand how I feel then :)

ZEPHYR MADNESS :)

2009-02-08T11:11:00.001-08:00

The price one has to pay for being funny is quite high. It is a lose more, win less situation. When you try to be comical, the first thing you have to bear in mind is that in order to draw maximum laughs, you need to at least crack a single joke on one of our own silly goof ups before beginning. For eg. before trying to draw laughs from my Zephyr team mates, I make it a point to start off with the very popular incident which involved my hand almost being taken off by the talons of a female student whose exploits draw maniacal laughter from my colleagues.

Only then do I proceed to imitate our sponsorship head Mr Nitesh Jha, who sings "Gulabi Aankhen" when he is all alone in the Zephyr cell, hums "Gulabi Aankhen" with his mouth full of paan masala, spits the paan masala out of the window when a sponsor's phone call suddenly drops in and calls everyone "buddy" before shaking them firmly by the hand :) . All jokes apart, he is a great guy to have in a team. There is an air of calmness when he is around and an aura of reassurdness in the way he handles things.

Then there is our very own Mama aka Abhishek Patil who laughs in mute mode, jerking his fingers violently and throws up one brilliant idea after another. He is the heart and soul os our local sponsorship and idea chucking division.

I then proceed to copy our cultural secretary Kameshwar K Kaza whose eternal line "JOSHI, we could have drawn fucking five grand out of that dealer" always continues to enthrall us.

It is a lively house, our Zephyr cell is......

Let us hope the fest kicks off well

CIAO

and oh yeah, I forgot, Amma...you are the sweetest and the best, Kamesh...Dude you rock, you will go places, Saurabh...you are the man,Teja...our very own techno cum painting guru,Shomik...our professional photographer, Pathak...our desi Jim Carrey, Shruti...the boy among girls and the most energetic one in the cell, Sandesh...our Mr Cucumber and me...the odd one out :) Cheers to us :) My apologies to the ones I forgot to mention :) Next time then....

:)

2009-02-02T20:07:00.000-08:00

Hi all :) Good to be back :) "The seamless sky which held a rosy hue for the past so many days, has now garnered clouds beyond comprehension"....dwell on this worthless line :) CIAO

CONFLICT........THE DARK AND THE UNREASONABLE.....

2009-01-15T03:04:00.000-08:00

"You wanted me, here I am"

"And you did not disappoint me .You and me are two of a kind... The outer world has rules and schemes. For them , you and me... we are outcasts. They might need us now, but when they are done..they will cast us out like lepers. All of society's rules,regulations and questions, they are a bad joke...they leave a bad taste in the mouth.Why worry about them??"

"Why do you want to kill me ?? Why has it come to this ?? Why do you want to leave me ??"

"Kill you ?? Leave you ??? Ha ha ha ha :) What would I do without you?? Go back to life the way it was ?? NO....you are a part of me.... YOU COMPLETE ME !!"

"You are not what I made you out to be...you are someone who toys with unplayable things and kills the soul for fun..."

"Do not try to talk like one of them...You are not.....Even if you try to be one... You are truly incorruptible aren't you ??? You believe in true emotions.... This is what happens when an indestructible force meets an immovable object."

"My heart just showed you that it is full of emotions ready to believe in what is good and true and I will not yield, I will not give up....."

"Not when it has been battered and destroyed beyond repair...You did not surely think that I would risk my heart in an emotional tryst with you ?? No, I had my ace up my sleeve. I took your heart and brought it down a level...you see sadness is like gravity...one push and you go over the edge :). I think that you and I are destined to do this forever :)"

"It cannot be like this....

It will not be like this.... I did my own heart in... I killed my own soul.... sometimes the truth is not enough.... sometimes you have to be the person you do not deserve but you rather need.... sometimes you have to repay people's trust... sometimes you need to reward their faith... I am not a hero or a lover...

I am a guardian, a silent angel... you will condemn me, you will set the dogs on me... but I will always be there... I am the person you do not deserve but you need...a knight...shining...I am your eternal dark love....."

EXILE NOTICE :)...........

2008-12-09T05:28:00.000-08:00

For all my readers ( I know that there are few of them :) ) a one month break is in order because my exams are on in full swing and my mom has told the internet connection wallas :) to resume the connection only after a month....so an exile of a month is in order...I will miss blogging in a way and I will definitely miss google talk :) Stay well and safe everybody. Take good care of yourselves.....and be good :) I ll try to find a PC and a net connection somewhere in case "not blogging" tears my nerves :) but I cannot promise :)

I spent last night observing a wall lizard...it was ever so patient and occupied the same spot on my wall for about an hour....I fell asleep looking at it and when I opened my eyes at 3 am to resume studies, it was still there...infinite patience...I wish we had it :) How simple would some things have been.... CIAO all .... wish me luck :)

FLYING EAST

2008-12-08T10:09:00.000-08:00

The lark is finding it very cold...It has decided to spread its wings and fly east for the winter...its warmer, maybe the ice in the heart will melt..............

GET READY....HE IS BACK....AGAIN....

2008-12-07T07:44:00.003-08:00

The wind was whistling through the tunnel....... The quietness of the night was punctuated by a pair of steady footfalls. As two people emerged from the tunnel, the train passed right over their heads and the little bridge shook with rigid force from the tremors.

The two people stopped at the edge of a thick bunch of fir trees. "Lumos !!", one of them whispered. The wand tip burst into light and casted it's radiance into a pair of startling green eyes, pale face and a scarred forehead wielding an untidy clump of jet black hair. "Come on Ginny, light your wand too, it is quite dark you know...". "Lumos", whispered another voice and the wand light illuminated a lovely face with fiery red hair and a determined pair of eyes.

"Will you at least tell me what's going on?? I demand to know it Harry... The kids will wander where we have vanished when they wake up in the morning", asked Ginny. "You need not worry about that Ginny. I have asked Ms Figg to take care of them. She will tell them that we have suddenly gone off on a holiday to Majorica as Uncle Vernon used to say", grinned Harry. "What that batty squib?? ", squealed Ginny. "Hush...She saved my skin at a Ministry hearing once, remember??", said Harry. He took Ginny firmly by the hand and led her deeper into the forest. "Now this is where we apparate", said Harry, "Hold on tight". "Will you at least tell me what are we up to ?", asked Ginny.

Harry looked at her for a second and then sighed ,"Now Ginny, something terrible has happened. Professor Mcgonagall has been held hostage. The kidnapper demands me as the ransom. The Order Of The Phoenix have assembled at Ron's place....the rest will be told to you when we reach there...".."Why you???", demanded Ginny. "Well, my scar has been prickling again..", confessed Harry. "But how can that be?? You Know Who is dead right??", asked Ginny. "That is true Ginny, but apparently the latest news is that...", Harry paused and then continued "Voldemort fathered a child...". Ginny reeled as if Harry had stunned her. Harry held her tightly and whispered into her ear"Apparently Bellatrix Lestrange was the mother...and she gave birth to the child before she died..........."

For more...wait and watch this label and space...

A FROZEN BODY RECOUNTS.........

2008-12-07T00:12:00.000-08:00

The mystery still continues to haunt me. Why is exasperation the outlet for suppression ?? The soul is very often padlocked, quartered and lynched. To seek the confines of loneliness is pretty normal in these circumstances.... Why do we throw away the key after chaining our wandering heart securely?

The problem lies in the snow storm which is blowing from the east...It has frozen my boots and I am not able to take a single step forward...The funny point is that the warmth my heart used to emanate earlier has been diffused...so the ice can no longer be melted...Maybe I am frozen for good now...like some prehistoric reptile....my blood has turned to water and I am waiting once again for someone to come along, melt the ice...excavate and rescue my failing frozen limbs and heart......

The heart seeks warmth like glowworms....and it shines bright when it i s happy.... But when you capture it in a bottle and stow it away....both the heart and the glowworm expire after sometime..... I seek redemption....not for my sins....but for all my good times....it is not your sins that haunt you.....it is the best times you have enjoyed in your life that come back to you like old forgotten ghosts....

Maybe I will wait again...lonely by the lakeside...my chin on my knees and my hands clasped around my legs in the dwindling sunlight and wait for the moon to disappear and the sun to bake my cold face with it's warmth...it's warmth that I need, with every passing day....I am being frozen into oblivion.....

SMASHED....QUITE LITERALLY :)

2008-12-06T07:22:00.000-08:00

If you poke your nose into business that does not concern you....very often...it gets smashed..That is exactly what I learnt today morning at 5 am....What could I have done??? He was my friend...and he needed my help... I needed to have his back covered...When it comes to friends, I do not compromise....

Ugly cuss words , parents, girlfriends...every person close to your heart....was ripped apart by vile tongues.... Mind you .... I seldom fight...but when it gets personal....I do not fuckin care even if he were to be the American president...

Fists flew....My nose got smashed....it bled and it bled heavily....Blood and it's loss always makes me dizzy.... When I came back home ..I had lined the entire road with blood spatters...But the guy who punched my nose :) I am very pleased to say, had his "Versace" shirt torn and stuffed up his a**...and maybe he could consider getting his left thigh replaced :) CIAO all....am in some pain :)

STRANGE....

2008-12-06T04:50:00.000-08:00

Is it the aura or is it just something I fail to grasp?? Or is it a warning ?? Or a natural death ??? I just cannot comprehend....I am losing it...the armor is being prepared again...the blizzard is blowing again....

HER BEAUTY......

2008-12-04T08:18:00.000-08:00

She danced her way into my life from heaven; the night was glittering,
The lovely violets paled in comparison to her rosy flush....
Her hair was tousled and her lovely eyes were glimmering.....

Her eyes were like a deep pool; the waters of which were warm and proud,
The air around her seemed to glow with her presence and aura,
Her simplicity was something that stood out from the rest of the crowd....

The mascara was evenly applied and there was just a hint of lipstick on those beautiful lips,
The ears were sporting simple studs and her arms were lovingly bare,
Her smile could light a million candles and her grace could flatten her majesty's ship....

I stretched for her hand, I tried to talk to her and I knew that she was the one...
Suddenly the lights brightened and I woke up once again....
The sun's rays hit my eyes...the angel I sought was gone...

"FUCK" IT IS GLORIOUS :)

2008-12-03T23:26:00.001-08:00

Pardon me for setting out on this distasteful venture :) but since I have no regard for tastes, especially those confined to moral and non – abusive posts….I thought that I would expound upon the shalom of all cuss and curse words : fuck…..

No censoring….its that simple and that funny…..

Fuck is the only cuss word which can be added in front of a majority of commonly used pronouns…. Just imagine the dizzying and varying possibilities

Fuck you, fuck me, fuck him, fuck his ***** etc ..etc …etc …the possibilities are endless….

Al Pacino and Robert De Niro come together in Righteous Kill and serve up a volley of fucks…. I watched the movie yesterday and approximated that there were almost 10 fucks a minute :)…The manner in which they say it is quite humorous actually…..

“I will put two fuckin bullets through his fuckin head myself“ says Pacino and with some style…but the best one comes from Robert De Niro “He fuckin..believes that fuck…Why in the fuckin hell does he fuckin believe the fuck who fucked up ?? “ Over usage of the word you might say :) But when De Niro says it ….it stays said…

“Fuck” allows you to happily vent your frustration. Whether you stub your toe or almost get run over by a car or let the bar of soap slip from your hand and land on the bathroom floor…a single “fuck” glorifies the moment and defines your innermost feelings comprehensively….

If you are spoiling for a fight, just go up and give the person a shove in the chest…please remember to add the following sentence “Who the fuck do you think you fuckin are ??” …The next few minutes will see you either emerge like Hollyfield or give you some tender body parts along with huge bruises….

Are you surprised?? You might as well say “FUCK !!!! “ with a tinge of amazement in your voice…..works like a charm :)

Are you pissed off by somebody?? Give him the “Fuck off” :)

Is nothing going right for you ?? It means you are “fucked up “ :)

One of my favorite Hollywood comedians, Billy Crystal came up with a gem in Inside The Actor’s Studio…. He said “If you can fuck him, fuck her, fuck yourself up …then you might as well fuck the goddamn hamburger you are fuckin chewing on “

Enjoy the endless myriad dwellings of the word “fuck” while I leave you with one of my better coined sayings…

“To be fucked up is normal, but to be fucked off is horrible”…………….CIAO

MY BAKERY AND MY BLOOD CAKE...

2008-12-02T00:55:00.001-08:00

I was alone with my sad soul; I had taken refuge in my little bakery,

The main ingredients were some happy memories and the splendid times,

I started mixing the batter and hummed a tune to shut out the outer world’s mockery,

Horrors !! The batter was red with my blood even as the Grandfather clock chimed….

I took a phial of my blissful nights, the ones that I had spent with happy dreams,

I added it to the batter along with those eternal moments which had made me their slave,

The red color refused to subside; I discovered that I was bleeding from my heart’s seams,

The blood was trickling into the batter; it was the price that I was destined to pay…..

I tried some eggs with the hope that the sunshine yellow yolks would do the trick,

They could brighten up my life’s cake and remove the dark red hue……

I then discovered that I was bleeding from the head with quite a steady drip….

The batter was solid to the core with the clotted blood; I knew that the baking was due….

I slid it into the oven and turned on the heat; the flames would wash away my pain;

It was my life blood, my soul that I was baking into a cake; alone in my little bakery…..

The oven timer chimed: I took the cake out and placed it by the window pane,

Maybe the smell would attract another lover who would free me from my little bakery…

WHEN I WAS A COMMANDO FOR A DAY....

2008-11-29T22:33:00.000-08:00

This incident took place when I was in class I...a tender and impressionable age...when I was just starting to be introduced to the infinite world of cricket :), when my hair was just starting to develop spikes of their own, when my heart used to regularly beat loudly on seeing cute girls and when I became conscious of my weight and my fat butt (I was chubby back then :) )

I was the great chief of the playground in front of my house...My loyal subjects included children from the neighboring colonies and the trees that lined the playground... On a lazy Sunday I decided to hold an important meeting with all my ministers. The point which was being discussed was of prime importance. There was this peanut seller who used to encroach our playing area before we used reach the park at 4pm... The exact motive of this peanut seller was never quite clear... Maybe he was a CEO fed up with life and the peanut package he was getting...Maybe he was a terrorist who was setting up a control room admist the trees so that he could attack us at a crucial juncture and take over the vast kingdom over which we ruled.....

The next day, we decided to put our plan to the practice test...With perfect commando like training we swooped down the playground slide and ran a short distance across and scaled the huge banyan tree under which some seniors were playing cricket....I imagined myself to be one of the elite commandos belonging to the MARCOS group and grappling one of the tree vines, I tried to execute a perfect rope rappel from the chopper (the banyan tree) onto enemy territory below....Alas..as soon as my feet hit the ground below....an explosion blew me of my feet...

Unfortunately one of the seniors playing cricket swung his bat towards me accidentally and it caught me flush in the mouth....I still remember kneeling over, my mouth a bloody mess...all my front milk teeth gone and shouting "mission aborted.....the terrorists have got me !!!!" before collapsing in a heap and sacrificing myself to become an immortal martyr on my school land.

My friends, solemnly carried me on their shoulders to the school hospital and gave me a 21 lollipop salute before leaving. The rest of the story is quite funny because the dentist told to have as much ice cream and cold drinks as possible to stimulate the numbed area in my mouth and within 5 months I grew back my teeth...But the incident taught me to respect the commandos who put their duty before their lives.... I salute the commandos who saved the day for all of us and pay a tribute to those who put down their lives while fighting for our motherland.

SOME STRIKING POINTS......DID YOU NOTICE THEM ????

2008-11-28T23:52:00.000-08:00

Some of the startling facts which hit me were during the recent terror attacks when I sifted through Shobha De's column were as follows. I have selected the striking ones :

1. Our city fathers have learnt nothing from the past blows to the gut. There was no one in charge when the city most needed a figure capable of leading from the front.

2. I hate to blame him, but the CM showed up outside the Trident when the crisis was nearly over.

3. With whom did the buck stop ??

4. We need to pay immediate attention to the requirements of our over burdened police force-those poor constables armed with nothing more lethal than laathis cant chase a rabid dog, forget about hard core, armed terrorists.

5. The police lack basic gear-helmets, bullet proof jackets, riot shields.

6. Minor politico move around with a convoy of police cars, security personnel, ambulances etc. Such privileges must be withdrawn and reserved for top ranking politicians only.

7. Where were our MPs ?? Priya Dutt, Milind Deora, Govinda, Hema Malini, Jaya Bachchan, our Mayor, Sheriff, Raj Thackeray, Uddhav Thackeray and Chhagan Bhujbal, the usual do gooders, one sees on TV panel discussions, so called activists, thought leaders and influence peddlers ??

8. The ones who deserve credit are the cops, the army, the commandos, tireless journos, magnificent hotel employees and guests of the hotel along with the BEST buses.

9. Mumbai is hemorrhaging and political tourniquets cannot save us. Radical surgery is required on the mighty heart of this great metropolis.

10. The "Spirit of Mumbai" tag is complete hogwash. I am not going to be the sentimental fool and holler "Salaam Mumbai' or 'What great people does this city have !! " or " We are the comeback kings".

Its time to shout, holler, "Wake up Mumbai and India". Fight back, fight back, fight back in a controlled way and make yourselves heard via controlled aggression. We will succeed for sure....

WHAT CAN WE DO ????

2008-11-28T20:36:00.000-08:00

Some questions which I wanted to answer :

1)" i don't get the focus on the taj. i understand the whole symbolic thing of course"

The Taj is a 106 year old monument and symbolizes MUMBAI. If you destroy the Taj you destroy a lot of people's hearts. Imagine the Qutub or the Red Fort or the Taj Mahal being destroyed. To understand the value of the Taj , you have to BE HERE in Mumbai and feel it........

2) What can we do ??

We are all literate people. Try writing to your daily newspapers and express your opinion on a platform where the whole of India can hear you. (Many people will say that they do not have the time huh !!! )

Register yourself as an active voter and get yourself a voter ID.

You can visit any of the leading news channels like TIMES NOW and HEADLINES TODAY during breaks and tell them that you want to voice your opinions. Believe me...and I am not kidding...if they see that you are earnest enough and you have credentials, they do give you the chance...Try the Radio channels if this is not possible.

Write in to the prime minister....silly you say?? Try it....and read the official response that you will receive.... Does everybody promise to do something ?? or will you resume your normal life after a week ???

3) Why the sensational journalism ???

Had the TV channels not been risking their lives, coming in the goddamn line of fire and bringing you exclusive details, we would have been waiting for the fucking morning paper to know about what happened....Give them credit when it is due...But yeah, some insensitive questions could be avoided....

Any more questions ??? Throw them up and I will reply....Finally its over though...Cheers to our commandos, the two South African commandos and the doctors who saved innumerable lives.... One thing is for sure....we are united this time .......

ITS STILL GOING ON.......

2008-11-28T07:05:00.000-08:00

Just an hour back I visited the President hotel...another five star hotel, a km away from the Taj and the Trident Hotel... My doctor cousin from Kolkata, Dr Prasenjit Chatterjee had arrived here in Mumbai for a conference and we had to whisk him away :) The roads were deserted and the only vans were those of TIMES NOW, NDTV, CNBC and ambulances.

My cousin is still visibly shaken up and his wife is repeatedly calling up to ensure his safety (Its his internet available Laptop that I have pinched :) )

Two choppers were circulating overhead and an additional commando force where rope dropped in... Almost 48 hours... India has really been held to ransom this time.... As the secretary to the Internal security Minister of India Kumavat held a press conference, some reporter asked him that why was there not an official count on the number of terrorists, he rightly replied that the main focus was on neutralizing and meeting their attack with hard resistance, an official count on the bodies and arrested would be done later.... You cant count when you are faced by gunfire....fair enough !!!!

Hold on India....we will get through....but this is far from over and we have not seen the last of it yet ......

PEOPLE OF MUMBAI AND INDIA....STAY CALM AND ACT NOW....

2008-11-28T00:04:00.005-08:00

Here in Mumbai, the atmosphere is electric and I mean it literally.... It probably is the most extreme act of defiance exhibited by the terrorists and as I type, the brave commandos are still combing the interiors of the Taj and the Oberoi Trident.... I have suppressed my anger...No practical use can come out of cursing the Government and some of their inefficiencies. No use can be extracted out of cursing the heartless terrorists who will either be killed or will be tortured by the Indian officials :)

My worst fear is that during the next elections some of the politicians might politicize this incident to fill their vote banks... Why is our voting still based on caste and creed ?? Why do the votes still go to the politicians who promise members of their caste and creed a brighter future ?? And ARE WE VOTING YET?? Sorry to say so, but us generation next are the ones who deserve the cuss words, us fuckers , we are the culprits. Being literate , a majority of us above the age of 19 still do not vote.... Why ?? How will competent leaders be elected ???? How will the illiterate politicians be weeded out ?? Sorry Generation next ...all our anger and misplaced sense of bravado and our cuss words aimed at the Government is utter bullshit.... Whom are we fooling?? Ourselves??
Stop cursing the government and start focusing on things you can do to help.....And what can the PM do ?? He can only calm us and appeal for order..... Its our Indian Intelligence which is a complete failure.... Will the PM now arm himself with a bazooka and stand guard over the Gateway of India ???....Let us be practical......

Is this the India shining we are dreaming about ?? Of what use is the 8 % growth that Chidambaram talks about if the families of the deceased are forgotten after four months? Of what use are the promises of being the new emerging economic power if we do not provide our commandos with proper bullet proof gear?? We pay them peanuts and expect them to take bullets for us ??? What about their families ?? Are the commando's families guaranteed a job in case the commando dies ??? India has gone past the stage where it could be saved by administering medicine.... India now requires surgery.What melted my heart and almost brought tears to my eyes was the way in which the people were shouting "Vande Mataram" and "Jai Hind" the moment the army contingent arrived. Situations like these require the army to take charge and it shows that the people place trust in them.......

My condolences to the families of Hemant Karkare, Ashok Kamte and Vijay Salaskar and my salute to the brave Indians who laid down their lives just so that we could sleep at night. Terrorism can never be stopped..its practically impossible... What can be done is the improvement of the recovery system..... False promises will not do.....The terrorists came prepared and determined....I wish we were half as well prepared as they were. My deepest sympathies are with all those who suffered and continue to do so...and I promise to play my part and vote this time....Angry shouting and cussing will not help...Strong and determined action will resound.... Let us ensure it this time.....People of Mumbai unite .....with all your hearts....People of India stand by us.....and together let us check what these destroyers of humanity threaten to damage.....

KHICHADI OR MIXED NONSENSE ... :) FIGURE IT OUT...

2008-11-25T09:08:00.000-08:00

The power of a thousand actions lies in a single word. From Shakespeare to Lord Byron, the spoken word and lyrical ode have formed the cornerstones of English Literature. The dreamy eyes of a man whose soul is swimming in the ocean of love and the anguish of the woman's heart who has lost her lover have been immortalized in the works of these greats. The brilliant London mornings, the smoky Chicago afternoons and the hazy Delhi evenings effuse a romance of their own from within the superb works of literature.

The point to be considered is that whether John Abraham and Daniel Craig should walk the red carpet together and immortalize their names on the Hollywood walk of fame not by imprinting their hands or footprints in the wet cement but by leaving their butt prints and a pair of their yellow and blue swimming trunks embedded as well....Mind you, they would have to be very careful as they would not want themselves to get stuck...errrr...you know what i mean :)

Besides the latest fad is the gay theme and it is becoming more popular by the day.... I read somewhere that Jai and Veeru were possibly gay and maybe Gabbar was gay as well because he challenged Basanti to dance on broken glass bits so that she could be put out of commission and he could have Veeru all to himself :) If you like gay jokes, you should definitely watch "The In Laws"....its hilarious.....

The latest thing to have struck me is that girls like repetitions...like sorry..sorry...sorry or no big deal...no big deal....Some mannerisms are really cute and bring out the inner playful child in them...When a girl laughs and smiles and tries to make you laugh...believe me...she looks really beautiful because there is nothing lovelier than a smiling girl and I know one such gem... :)

God created the cat with a purpose. I recently conducted an experiment to find out the effect of ice cubes on cats and the result was nothing less than explosive...My favorite silvertab shorts were reduced to cleaning rags and I narrowly escaped getting my underwear and legs reduced to minced bits.... :) I then realized that God created cats to scratch naughty boys who have nothing better to do....

CIAO.....

THE SCAR STORY ...

2008-11-23T06:49:00.000-08:00

I am in an autobiographical mode today….My left hand is littered with several scars….One on my forearm…Three on each of my knuckles….three on my fingers and one on my palm……

The scars have taught me several important lessons:

1) Do not ever rush to someone’s aid unless you have the capability to take pain… I have been luckily blessed with the capability to absorb reasonable amounts of pain…..

2) Do not think that being a hero is easy…beating up the villains is not child’s play. 9 out of 10 times you will be beaten up instead.

I come from Lucknow, the city of Nawabs. Now Lucknow is divided into two parts, old Lucknow and the modern part known as Gomti Nagar. In old Lucknow there is a place known as Aminabad, famous for it’s numerous shops, notorious for the various murders it has played host to and feared for it’s social unrestlessness.

I had once gone to have a dekko accompanied by some of my friends at around 7 in the evening. Now Aminabad has several arms shops which sell air guns, pistols etc….All my friends crowded into the shops excitedly to have a look at the “pieces of art” :). I, on the other hand preferred to visit the aquarium across the street. I enjoyed myself thoroughly and learnt a lot about “kippers” and “guppies” that day.

As I was stepping out of the shop I happened to cross a dark alley which led to a rural Muslim settlement some metres away. My ears were literally pierced by a scream which rang out…I placed the scream to have come from a small girl and assumed that she must be in some sort of trouble… I looked around me…Everybody had either not heard the scream or else were pretending not to have heard it at all. I strode into the alley and was encountered with a truly disgusting sight.

A small girl about 8 to 9 years old was being held by three young boys…One of them was trying to perform some horrible activity with her skirt because the way he was tugging at it sickened me…The other two were holding onto to each of her arms. What truly shocked me was the age of the girl!! Such a small girl…Such a tender age…even small girls are not safe nowadays…. I let fly with some expletives and tried to scare the boys away…To my horror all three of them came flying at me…Two of the bastards caught me by the neck and arms while the third proceeded to slap me left, right and centre. The poor girl scampered off and stood at a distance and watched with her hands tightly clutching her braid.

I managed to free myself somehow and took the swine in front of me by the throat and proceeded to tear his shirt off…But I had discounted the other two…All of a sudden I felt something warm trickling down my forearm. The bastards had slit it with a vegetable knife…. A peanut hawker had arrived on the scene and confronted by the fight he ran to get some help….The pain was blinding…. Looking at blood makes me dizzy and the amount of blood flowing out of my arm made me nauseous… The boys proceeded to push me against a standing Bajaj Pulsar and to my misfortune the bike came down on my left hand…My left hand was flattened under the bike tanker and I was howling like someone on the verge of madness…… My howling did scare the boys away though :) They scampered like rabbits…. I do have a loud voice……People swarmed the place and rest of the story is as usual the same boring one…Everyone took me took me to a doctor…..I got patched up…blah blah blah and I kept smirking at the spineless asses who did not have the decency to react to the girl’s screams.

That is the story of my scars of some of the scars….My heart went out to the little girl and all the girls in general…. All my life I have treated the fairer sex with the outmost respect and never touched them without their permission…. The sight of the boys all over the little girl really made me feel ashamed of the male community…. I wish I could flog the bastards if I get another chance but first I must bulk up my body a bit…excuse me :) the dumbells are waiting :)

THE MISTAKE....THE BLADE...

2008-11-23T05:48:00.000-08:00

His hands were shaking….He curled his fist into a ball. The bottle, full of brandy a few minutes ago was almost empty now….Streaks of liquor stained the sides of his mouth and colored his spotless white shirt a shade of deep brown. His eyes were straining out of their sockets… His nerves were failing him…..He remained glued to his wicker chair as if he had been struck down by apoplexy.

The shrouded body which lay beside him now was moist with tears from his eyes….His hands wandered of their own accord from his side and removed part of the shroud to uncover the face…It was an angelic face…pale and fair with wisps of golden and curly hair peeping out from under the head……..

He remembered the day very clearly…This very girl had rushed into his arms…She was so full of life with her bright blue eyes twinkling and her petite frame warm and full of youth’s blessed energy. She had told him that she loved him dearly and he was taken by surprise….How could somebody love a sinner like him???? She clearly was not aware of his alter ego…his demonic other self…. But her face captivated him and her concern warmed his cold heart….Maybe… he thought in his mind, he was beginning to fall in love…..

He shook himself out of his reverie and knelt beside the girl’s body and spoke in a trance like state:

“Please oblige me this once my angel,

Please make me lonely once more,

Without you I cannot live,

I can now never tell you about my love for you…

Please oblige me this once,

Make me the lonely person I used to be…

Why did we break apart my princess??

Why did our love come to an end??

Sleepless nights and unanswered questions now haunt me…

Everything is incomplete without you…

I cannot bear this loneliness…

I cannot live without you….

Please oblige me this once my angel,

Please make me lonely once more…

Now that you are not here,

Your memories are in my mind and heart,

Your absence drives my tears,

Give me an excuse to forget you…..

I cannot bear this loneliness…

I cannot live without you….

Please oblige me this once my angel,

Please make me lonely once more.”

He broke into heartrending and piteous sobs as he buried his face into her cold shoulder……

He suddenly tore himself away from her body and strode across the dimly lit room and grasped the bloodstained surgical knife kept on the dressing table…Fever seared through his body as he recalled the horrible incident….

It had been as easy as ever….He had hid himself in the dark alleyway…He wanted to get this night’s exercise over with quickly… He had spotted a young lass skipping down the alleyway with bubbly energy and zest… In one fluid motion, he had grasped her by her hood and slit her throat using his knife…The exercise was over within a few seconds…He felt warm with delight as he stood shrouded in the London fog…With his toe he rolled his victim over to look at her face and slowly his blood turned to ice in his veins…. It was her…. He had sunk down to his knees tearing his hair out in desperation……. What a mistake he had committed!!!! How was he to know that she would come skipping into his cold arms where he lay waiting like an agent of hell??

The church bell chimes aroused him from his painful thoughts…… He looked at himself in the mirror and wiped his face clean…The hands had stopped shivering…He slipped on his gloves and cleaned the knife blade…He shrugged on his long black overcoat and breezed out of the room….. Jack the Ripper was out again….

MY MOON....

2008-11-23T04:58:00.001-08:00

All the stars of the universe are present in front of me….but I cannot spot my moon….my beautiful moon…. My eyes are moist, my heart is painfully heavy…..

Destiny…please let me meet my love…I beg of you….I plead in front of you…. Life is very short and full of pain and travesties. My heart is lost; confounded by the pain, sadness is my medicine. My life is colourless and my surroundings are bland. My moon, please awaken my luck and make me happy….give me some bliss…

Destiny…please let me meet my love…I cry before you….I plead in front of you…Please listen to my prayers….

I have fulfilled all the rituals of love and I have tolerated all the pain love has had to offer… My nights have been spent in tears….I have faced all the tests….Please give me my love now….Please answer my prayers….My foolish heart refuses to listen to any excuses…. Show me some signs of love or else remove my existence….The pain is overwhelming…. My life is tasteless…Please arouse my luck for me….Please listen to my prayers……

Please let me meet my moon….please let me meet my love…My heart cries out in anguish…..

WHY ARE YOU NOT CONFIDENT PEOPLE ???

2008-11-21T07:38:00.000-08:00

Why do a majority of us suffer from a severe inferiority complex ?? Some of us are "overconfident swaggering ass***es" and the rest of us are plain underconfident....

Why are we not confident in our own abilities??? Why do we always feel that the other person's abilities supercede our own ????

Why do we concede defeat and always think that somebody else will selected/come first/beat us to the finishing line????

I am adopting a slightly different technique....I believe that I am the best....Nobody knows what I am thinking....Nobody knows what my next move is going to be......That is why champions succeed...because they are unpredictable....

Every hour of the day, every second of the night.... I believe that I am the best....There is nobody better than me....and I back it up by simply not letting the other person beat me.... You see, only if you concede defeat have you lost.....If you fight and then lose, you are still the best....you have just had a bad day at the office :)

I am the best...I am not being overconfident...I am not being Jack Swagger....I simply believe that the other person has to beat me to undermine my claim.....I am ready for the fight....

So should everybody else be ready for the brawl...stop treating yourself like destitutes....All of you are the best in your chosen fields.....look for people to beat and stake your claim...If you want to win....you have to PLAY THE GAME :)

PLAY IT NOW :)

I AM THE GAME....TIME TO PLAY ME >>>>>>

2008-11-20T09:06:00.000-08:00

The enigma is going to be unraveled and the doors are going to open. The green light will burst forth and flood over all of you…the light will paint you, subdue you and make you look up to the ultimate mystery……..

I am the game, the code, the path to the grail….

If you want to know me better….you will have to play the GAME…..me…..ABC….the paroxysm of hardness and the debt you can never pay…..

This is my level…my world…my rules……my weapons…..

For ages…I have been mowed around, kicked about and hurt…not anymore… The GAME is here….

Maybe I take inspiration from the original GAME….but then….it is all about who has control and who can take the dominance. I have never ending levels, each harder than the next….. I am the vortex, the unbreakable metaphor…..

You will get sucked in….you will be burnt in hell…you will kicked aside and left to die like a fool :) that is if I do not like you…if I do like you….then you will offered a choice to quit…because once you decide to play the GAME….you may have a hard time…

It’s all about the Game and how you play it……

Try me….try to know me…….because it is time to play the game……

Straight from hell, all fury will be let loose……if you survive….you will be face to face with the king of kings……

Every hour, every minute and every second….I have to back up my words and I do…because….I am the best….I am the GAME……

PRESS PLAY TO HEAR MY ANTHEM.....

A PLACE FOR MY HEAD !!!!

2008-11-18T11:04:00.000-08:00

Dedicated to all terrorists and stupid politicians :

I watch how the moon sits in the sky in the dark night
Shining with the light from the sun
and the sun doesn't give light to the moon assuming
The moon's gonna owe it one
It makes me think of how you act for me you do
favors then rapidly
You just turn around and start askin' me about
Things that you want back from me

I'm sick of the tension
Sick of the hunger
Sick of you acting like I owe you this
Find another place
to feed your greed
While I find a place to rest

I wanna be in another place
I hate when you say you don't understand
You'll see it's not meant to be
I wanna be in the energy
Not with the enemy
A place for my head

Maybe some day I'll be just like you
And
Step on people like you do
And run away all the people I thought I knew
I remember back then who you were
Used to be calm, used to be strong,
Used to be generous, but you should have known
That you'd wear out your welcome and now you see
How quiet it is all alone

I'm so sick of the tension
Sick of the hunger
Sick of you acting like I owe you this
Find another place to feed your greed
While I find a place to rest

I'm so sick of the tension
Sick of the hunger
Sick of you acting like I owe you this
Find another place to feed your greed
While I find a place to rest!

I wanna be in another place
I hate when you say you don't understand
You'll see it's not meant to be
I wanna be in the energy
Not with the enemy
A place for my head

You try to take the best of me
Go away
You try to take the best of me
Go away
I wanna be in another place
I hate when you say you don't understand
You'll see it's not meant to be
I wanna be in the energy
Not with the enemy
A place for my head

SHUT!
UP!
Why?!!

I am so sick of the tension
Sick of the hunger
Sick of you acting like I owe you this
Find another place to feed your greed
While I find a place to rest

I am so sick of the tension
Sick of the hunger
Sick of you acting like I owe you this
Find another place to feed your greed
While I find a place, to, rest

BREAKIN THE HABIT....

2008-11-18T08:20:00.001-08:00

Memories consume
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume
I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again

I don't want to be the one
The battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize
That I'm the one confused

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight

Clutching my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I had no options left again

I dont want to be the one
The battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize
That I'm the one confused

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So, I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight

I'll paint it on the walls
'Cause I'm the one at fault
I'll never fight again
And this is how it ends

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
to show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So, I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
I’m breaking the habit
Tonight

WHEN I FINALLY SMILED :)

2008-11-14T04:32:00.001-08:00

Now, after a long time, a long, long time…I have smiled and posed for a photograph…usually I am like a grim reaper….. like Harman Baweja (expressionless while acting :) )….

Well , I did smile once before, when my kid brother was tugging off my towel which was loosely draped around my waist and I got clicked in an embarrassing position….Someone remarked, “Abhik, where are all your teeth ???” Tongue in cheek, I replied that they were firmly in my mouth…

I decided that it was about time…I put on Sultans of Swing : Dire Straits, real loud and smiled…and you know what ??…it felt really good :)

TAKE YOUR SEATS ALL YA>>>THE RAPPIN IS OUT ....

2008-11-13T07:39:00.000-08:00

Greetings all ya people….The time is right and the dose is tight…I thought that I would try my hand at rappin…yak no..The mike in hand…trash talking, rhyming thing …Well I have tried people…here it goes….And make sure you wear your pants down low :)

The thing is coming truly from my heart all ya,

I love life and all that it gives and it’s rad,

Permissions are not what I seek so don’t grant me some,

Fuck, Bitch, Cruise and all that jazz is not my fun…

The stage is set and I am the man you want,

I break bottles on heads and I straighten the runt…

If ya join me, why should I even care??

If ya go against me, I will rub you bare :)

The time is right and the disc is spinning,

I am in the right car and my horse is winning,

I m gonna take my chances and place my bets,

The race aint over yet until the horse is dead….

The bastards who think that touchin ladies is fun,

I will squash ur balls, lets see if you like it son,

Eye for an eye, hitch up your pants all you people,

If you wanna fight me, winning is not that simple….

So why don’t you stop and smell the roses,

Cause getting kicked in the butt is like lead shot doses,

My name’s ABC and if you are looking for me,

Just spot the next tiger and get mauled for free.

THE MAIDEN AND THE SHADOW......

2008-11-13T07:10:00.000-08:00

The presence of the shadow was haunting. It was bordering on supernatural phobia but it felt no more than the sixth sense tingling. She looked around and felt it again…The skin buds were tingling….warning her of danger. She hastened her steps and coagulated with the heavy crowd….The ocean was crowded that night…..The sky was starry and welcoming….

Her mind was preoccupied with the shadow…It loomed up at every corner; it peeked out of the remotest place…. She felt her fire in her belly. The fire was good….it warmed her. The warmth from heated coals was always pleasant.

She closed her eyes savoring the warmth and for the briefest of moments let her guard down. Silence rang out for those few seconds and when she opened her eyes the shadow was before her….It had captured her at long last. Tall, menacing, ruthless and brutal…..it stood before her…

She tried to shrink away…..but the shadow spared her no time…It violated her, pierced her….. She felt helpless….the pain was numbing….How strong and secure she had felt some hours ago!!! But this vile beast had destroyed her…She gasped…the pain was overwhelming…The monster was still inside her….then suddenly it let go…..Disaster poured in…

She was drowning….her soul destroyed; her dignity smashed, her virginity violated….She sank to the bottom and lay there….peacefully…. Her last thoughts were… “I am the Titanic and I am destructible“. Miles above her the savage iceberg silently floated further away into the dark ocean…..

AVE THE INDIAN CAESAR....AU REVOIR MAHARAJ... BECAUSE SOMETIMES YOU NEED THE QUANTUM OF SOLACE :)

2008-11-11T06:18:00.000-08:00

Stars are often the hardest to reach when you try to infallibly reach them, by standing on tiptoes. The ones who jump up and grab them are the real heroes. Having fought his way through a million wagging tongues, apprehensible experts, homicidal critics and brutal marshes, Sourav Ganguly has finally called it a day.

If Kumble was subtle, Ganguly was overbearingly loud in his approach to the game initially, quite literally :) The ardor of the man was bordering on apocalyptic madness. His desire to succeed was raging through his veins like lava. Arguably one the best left handers the world has hated and loved at the same time leaves us with a legacy that could help bald men grow back their hair.

“When Sourav was discarded from the Indian team, he put up an extraordinary display of resilience and imbibed superhuman determination to prove his detractors wrong. He often used to get up in the middle of the night and awaken his house help. He used to clear the drawing room area and ask his help to throw plastic balls so that he could practice. This would often continue into the wee hours of the morning”

Sourav Chandidas Ganguly, the immortal controversial figure, the universal dada, the god on the offside, the arrogant brat who refused to carry drinks onto the field when he was the 12^th man, the man who showed us that wrestlers are not the only people in the sports arena who can take off their shirts, the man who practiced in a park with two small bricks as stumps when he was unceremoniously dropped from the team….the man who gave Indian cricket the saber toothed edge…..

The essence of a hero lies in the manner in which he picks himself up bloodied and battered with sand crusts sticking to his face to fight one more battle. Sourav was the Julius Caesar (with something extra) of Indian cricket. Both were extraordinarily ambitious men, born leaders and arrogant in their own rights. Caesar defeated Pompey and took hold of a politically unstable Rome, while Ganguly took over the reins of the Indian cricket team when the country was recovering from the shocks of a grave match fixing scandal. Both Caesar and Ganguly accepted the crown of thorns. Caesar introduced a string of superfluous and excellent policies and commercial decisions which changed the face of Rome. Ganguly with his youth policy and his devil may care attitude infused the brash fighting spirit into the beggarly and defused Indian team. Caesar was betrayed by the man he trusted, Brutus, He was cornered from every side, stabbed and humiliated and finally laid to rest in a bloody mass on the very land he ruled. Ganguly was betrayed by the very coach whose job he himself had helped to secure and was humiliated badly.

But Ganguly did not die….he stitched his wounds back up and returned to the battlefield, hungry, bloodthirsty for runs and determined to cross out Lady Fortune’s curses which had affected his brilliant career.

The smiling Maharaj started off brilliantly at the beginning of his career, scaling new horizons, sailing like a Columbus, conquering and discovering territory when India toured abroad, following unbound precedents, dancing like a ballerina down the pitch and launching the ball into the crowd as if to say that the ground was not big enough for him and the ball together. His cover drives, like scones and tea on a sunny British afternoon, his square cuts like a Deverish swordsman aiming for the neck, his sweeps like the avenging Tsunami sweeping over helpless lands…punishing the opposition bowlers, literally all the off spinners of the world retreated back into the shadows on seeing him.

The man who spent lonely afternoons in a coffee shop on the South African tour when he was ignored by the rest of team, the man who preferred the company of a packet of chips and a stroll by the riverside to quell his anger at the injustice was in fact a stubborn man who hated failure. Sometimes when you hate failure badly enough, you end up winning. The man who tamed the Kangaroo, wrestled the Pathan and made the Jamaicans dance to his calypso was at one time the Don Juan of the cricketing world. Umpires were his least favorite animated objects on the cricket field and match referees were amongst his choicest friends. His policy of win the toss and bat first was simple and devastating enough. His aura was confidence personified….his sheer brutality in terms of giving it back to the opposition was stunning.

“Apne Dada ko to nahin bhule ???” the one television commercial which I am sure must have made true cricket lovers and Sourav fans cry or atleast have moist eyes once…. How earnest were his words!! How humbled was the man who once was the undisputed Lord of Indian cricket!! How mellow was the man who was once the king of brashness!!

From glory to dust, Sourav Ganguly has seen everything. From a prince to a pauper and then again back to being the Maharaj, the man with the magic touch has fought the eye of the sandstorm, been rudely polite :) and has also taught people how to pick up the towel once you have thrown it down. Straight talk and self assuredness are his greatest assets. India’s greatest ever captain ended his last test match at Nagpur in a most befitting manner. A mature and wonderful gesture on Dhoni’s part to allow him to captain the side towards the end for a brief interval , infused into him the lost energy and child like enthusiasm as the Maharaj for the one last time took to captaincy as a duck takes to water. As someone close to me rightly said that it was sad to see him not being interviewed during the prize distribution, but the prince did take his shirt off for the last time and closed the chapter on one of the greatest success and comeback stories in sports history. The Muhammed Ali of cricket has finally hung up his gloves. It made me cry….because I would never get to see the chequered bandana, the green yellow goggles, the nail biting and the play of a man who selflessly put his own successful opening slot on line to give India one of it’s current heroes : Virender Sehwag….. play in Indian colours. The man who quit tennis and football to turn to cricket deserves a tribute…..

Let us pay Sourav Ganguly the tribute he deserves. The man who was liked by some, hated by many but adored by millions has finally gone…..His memories will roam on the offside forever and his story will inspire generations to come…..His shirt will be firmly on his back and he will, I am sure give much back to Indian cricket because he has amassed so much from it…..

REASONS WHY... I CANNOT BE...JAMES BOND... AT LEAST FOR NOW :)

2008-11-09T08:18:00.000-08:00

1. I do not possess blue swimming trunks.

2. I do not have an Aston Martin DB with a cardiac revival system.

3. I have never been inside Queen Victoria's personal bedroom :) or bathroom :) [ I heard she had a crush on Bond].

4. I am bad at poker, I stink at fencing and I cannot stay under cover without going to the toilet for 15 minutes under pressure.

5. I like my orange juice stirred and not shaken.

6. I have no clue about keeping my shoes shiny even after chasing a fugitive through a dirty street and kicking the daylights out of him.

7. I am A ONE WOMAN MAN :) Sorry Bond, it looks good on you, but brother a piece of advice, either get a girlfriend or get married.

8. I cannot get my balls crushed with a steel ball and return to kicking butt within a week a la Casino Royale.

9. I cannot shoot a woman with a BAZOOKA for god's sake....give the woman a chance atleast :)

10. I am very poor at kissing unknown woman 5 minutes after meeting them.

11. For all those long missions does he have time to change underwear ?? Bond!! you unhygienic freak !!!

12. I have more hair than Daniel Craig :) Brosnan was perfect though :)

13. I cannot keep up with M's sarcastic comments knowing that that the old hag has a crush on me :)

14. I cannot kiss underwater for nuts :) Lotsa kissing is a perk though :) for Bond not for me :)

15. He is British :)

One common thing bonds us though,
Both of us are hot :) sizzling hot :) Am I kidding?? Well you decide :) CIAO

SMOKING PARRYWARE CERAMICS !!!

2008-11-07T08:50:00.001-08:00

Caught in the whirlpool of file submissions in my college, the last few days were torture for me. I desperately sought a friend to help me complete my block diagrams while I struggled with my written work but all the damn monkeys had vanished after submitting their files on time. To top it all, I contracted a stubborn stomach virus. I suspect it had invaded my body after I had had a late night snack of Monaco biscuits dipped in liquid cheese. Maybe it was a carbohydrate complex…I thought that it was a damn protein….

The after effects of the virus caused me to occupy the bathroom for an extraordinarily long period of time. Most of the time was spent lying on the bathroom floor .One of my friends came over to my place as he was concerned about my illness. My piteous moans and groans shook the life out of him and he seemed poised to haul me to the hospital whenever the situation would get out of hand. But even he gave up after a while because he arrived at the conclusion that I was trying to merge with the bathroom floor tiles and spent his time watching a comedy flick about a terminally ill student on Star Movies.

I called up one of my family doctors who had settled in the south and asked him to treat me over the phone. Through his South Indian accent, I grabbed some of the points he stated for my welfare. “STUPID ASS” and “DO NOT EVER CALL HERE AGAIN YOU SWINE !!!” were the ones which left a profound effect on me. I contacted one of my pals, Dr Gautam Kumar. He is not really a doctor; as a matter of fact I am not sure if he is a person after all. He suggested that I drop my pants and roam about on the terrace in my underpants while carrying a dumbbell in one hand. This procedure he claimed, had cured many patients. After I threatened to smash his face with two huge bricks and lynch him with my old socks, irritated, he suggested another cure. He advised me to get hold of a rag picker’s shoes and smell them till I fainted. After regaining my senses, he promised that I would be fully cured. I cursed him with all my might and slammed the phone down after threatening to sell his body to Da Vinci’s descendants for exhuming. ( Did Da Vinci have relations ????? )

After this mentally disintegrating incident, I fled to the zoo and observed baboons curing their stomach aches by feeding on grass. I stealthily entered their cage to steal some of the grass, only to driven away by the guard who ripped the shirt off my back and gave me a red a** akin to a baboon.

Exhausted I reached home only to find a digene pill and a glass of water by my bedside with a small note which read “Dear Abhik, have this and please contact Monaco Industries for a job as they want a lab rat to test their new mint flavored biscuits on ….”

SHOCKS AND UPSETS

2008-11-06T11:36:00.000-08:00

After match day 5

2008 First Phase - Group A
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Chelsea	4	2	1	1	6	3	2	0	0	5	0	0	1	1	1	3	3	7
2	Roma	4	2	0	2	7	5	1	0	1	4	3	1	0	1	3	2	2	6
3	Bordeaux	4	2	0	2	4	8	1	0	1	2	3	1	0	1	2	5	-4	6
4	CFR Cluj-Napoca	4	1	1	2	3	4	0	1	1	1	2	1	0	1	2	2	-1	4

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group B
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Inter Milan	4	2	2	0	7	4	1	1	0	2	1	1	1	0	5	3	3	8
2	Anorthosis Famagusta	4	1	2	1	6	5	1	1	0	6	4	0	1	1	0	1	1	5
3	Panathinaikos	4	1	1	2	6	7	0	1	1	2	4	1	0	1	4	3	-1	4
4	Werder Bremen	4	0	3	1	3	6	0	1	1	0	3	0	2	0	3	3	-3	3

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group C
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Barcelona	4	3	1	0	11	3	1	1	0	4	2	2	0	0	7	1	8	10
2	Sporting Lisbon	4	3	0	1	5	3	2	0	0	3	0	1	0	1	2	3	2	9
3	Shakhtar Donetsk	4	1	0	3	3	5	0	0	2	1	3	1	0	1	2	2	-2	3
4	FC Basel	4	0	1	3	2	10	0	0	2	1	7	0	1	1	1	3	-8	1

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group D
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Atlético Madrid	4	2	2	0	7	3	1	1	0	3	2	1	1	0	4	1	4	8
2	Liverpool	4	2	2	0	7	4	1	1	0	4	2	1	1	0	3	2	3	8
3	Marseille	4	1	0	3	5	6	1	0	1	4	2	0	0	2	1	4	-1	3
4	PSV Eindhoven	4	1	0	3	3	9	1	0	1	2	3	0	0	2	1	6	-6	3

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group E
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Man Utd	4	2	2	0	7	1	1	1	0	3	0	1	1	0	4	1	6	8
2	Villarreal	4	2	2	0	9	5	2	0	0	7	3	0	2	0	2	2	4	8
3	Celtic	4	0	2	2	1	5	0	2	0	1	1	0	0	2	0	4	-4	2
4	AaB	4	0	2	2	5	11	0	1	1	2	5	0	1	1	3	6	-6	2

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group F
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Lyon	4	2	2	0	10	6	1	1	0	4	2	1	1	0	6	4	4	8
2	Bayern Munich	4	2	2	0	6	2	1	1	0	4	1	1	1	0	2	1	4	8
3	Fiorentina	4	0	3	1	3	6	0	2	0	1	1	0	1	1	2	5	-3	3
4	Steaua Bucuresti	4	0	1	3	3	8	0	0	2	3	6	0	1	1	0	2	-5	1

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group G
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Arsenal	4	2	2	0	10	3	1	1	0	4	0	1	1	0	6	3	7	8
2	FC Porto	4	2	0	2	5	7	1	0	1	3	2	1	0	1	2	5	-2	6
3	Dynamo Kiev	4	1	2	1	3	3	0	1	1	2	3	1	1	0	1	0	0	5
4	Fenerbahce	4	0	2	2	3	8	0	1	1	2	5	0	1	1	1	3	-5	2

November 6, 20082008 First Phase - Group H
		Overall						Home					Away
		GP	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	W	D	L	GS	GA	GD	P
1	Juventus	4	3	1	0	7	3	2	0	0	3	1	1	1	0	4	2	4	10
2	Real Madrid	4	2	0	2	5	5	1	0	1	2	2	1	0	1	3	3	0	6
3	Zenit St Petersburg	4	1	1	2	4	4	0	1	1	2	3	1	0	1	2	1	0	4
4	BATE Borisov	4	0	2	2	3	7	0	1	1	2	4	0	1	1	1	3	-4	2

Key

GP: Games Played, W: Wins, D: Ties, L: Losses, GS: Goals Scored, GA: Goals Against, GD: Goal Differential, P: Points

The past few days have yielded some shocking results indeed. Being a die hard Manchester United fan, I was very and heartily pleased to see Chelsea whipped 3-1 by AS Roma. Chelsea were expected to win, at least draw this fixture but some cow dung like defending saw Pannucci make a mockery of Scolari's famed defence and score a goal much to Chelsea's embarrassment. Vuccinic added a brace to further Chelsea's misery before Terry pulled a scrappy goal back for his team.

Manchester United were held to a 1-1 draw by Celtic who after their 3-0 drubbing at Old Trafford seemed to play a new brand of attacking football in the first half. I was irritated to see Celtic field a "dirty" 5-5 formation in the second half. They defended earnestly before the power and curl on a Ronaldo shot in the 83rd minute caused Giggs to head home an equalizer and save United the blushes. Berbatov and Rooney's absence in the first half seemed to reduce United's edge as they put up a lackluster performance.

Del Piero is in stunning form as the Juventus star added two superb goals to kick Real Madrid hard and hand them a 2-0 defeat. I was surprised to see Casilass's wall positioning which handed Del Piero his second goal via a free kick. Robben's calf muscle injury will be expected to hamper Real further.

Arsenal and Fenerbache played out a boring draw and I could hardly keep myself awake.

Maxi Rodriguez scored a stunner for Athletico Madrid who were hard done by Gerrard's superb diving effort [:)] which handed Liverpool a farce penalty in the 95th minute which they grabbed with both hands.

It is going to be an interesting next few matches as the teams will go all out to top their various groups and I have sworn that I will put up posts covering the Champion's League and the Barclay's Premier league with my own unique oddball style of coverage :)

Keep watching :)

SHOLAY >>> RE POLITICIZED :) : PART 1

2008-11-04T09:48:00.000-08:00

The world political scene is SO delightful ( and alarming ) today, so very comparable to SHOLAY… Ha ha ha ha ha … Every time I think of it, I collapse backwards laughing like a maniac…. Let us just put my point into perspective and enjoy a few laughs along the way because the way I see it, quite a few of our characters are going to be shot down in the most deplorable high noon cowboy style shootout, and no….. :) they are not going to be buried with their boots on :) [ which would be an honor they do not deserve , except for a select few ].

SHOLAY

Director : Hell….nobody, the film is recording itself :)

Producers : All the democrats.

Cast :

Jai – B. Obama

Veeru – McCain

Basanti- Sarah Palin

Dhanno- Vilaasrao Deshmukh

Radha- C. Rice

Thakur- Manmohan Singh

Ramlal – Laloo Prasad Yadav

Mausiji- Sonia Gandhi

Bade Imam Sahab- Nicolas Sarkozy

Gabbar- George Bush

Samba- Zardari

Kaalia – Richard B Cheney

Here are some of the famous dialogues and scenes twisted in my wicked way, if this film would really have been made :)

Gabbar : Ye nuclear deal ka green signal pehle tu de de thakur…..

Hum log tumhare baad sign karenge…

Thakur : Nahi, Nahi…..

Gabbar : De de, Thakur….. DE DE mujhe…….

Thakur : ( Sings SINGH IS KING loudly and dances about)

Basanti : waise sau bat ki ek baat yeh hai ki mai utna bolti nahi par mujhe mehnge mehnge kapde pehenkar debate mein jana achcha lagta hai

Veeru : Arre, tum meri ho jao, tumhe kabhi kapdon ki kami nahi hogi

Jai sits outside his quarters and plays GOD BLESS AMERICA on his mouthorgan while C. Rice switches the White House lights on and off slowly and repeatedly.

Gabbar : Kitne aadmi the?

Kaalia : Do sarkar…..

Gabbar : Usme se kahin ek aadmi bearded to nahi tha??

Kaalia : Osama? Nahi sarkar

Gabbar : 2 candidates aur tum 6 phaltoo chamche, yeh to sarasar mere liye buri khabar hai (4 saal aur white house mein masti karni thi ) badi naainsafi hai….

Kaalia : Sarkar, maine aapka White House ka jootha doughnut khaya hai Sarkar….

Gabbar : Le ab Iraq me daali hui bomb kha…..

Gabbar : Arre O Samba, election ke results kab hai ?

Samba : (Busy settling his hair with kilotons of gel) [starts and falls off his perch into the ravine below] : {calls out from below} Sorry Sardar, Pervez ne naya kabeela banaya hai Ramgadh ke paas…

Gabbar : Kitna inaam rakhkha hai Sarkar ne humare sar pe?

Samba : Poore, 50,000 Iraqi chicken tikke Sarkar…

Gabbar : Bahut yarana lagta hai tum dono mein, arre Chamakchalo hume bhi dikhao na do teen election campaigning ke secrets….

Veeru : Nahi Basanti, mat naachna in neech democrats ke saamne…

Gabbar : Jab tak tum high heel boots pehen kar naachogi, tab tak isko main Statue Of Liberty se neeche nahi giraanonga……

Veeru : Kutte, Kamine…. main tera White House wala milk shake pee jaoonga……

Thakur : Ramlal, mujhe mera shawl pehna do…..

Ramlal : abhi nahi…dhuut, abhi to Chaat Puja hai…main Bihar vapas jar raha hoon….

TO BE CONTINUED :)

DESI GIRL :) : THE BEAUTIFUL INDIAN WOMAN

2008-11-03T09:22:00.001-08:00

I feel as if I know so much about the modern Indian woman already but everyday…. coming across a new member of the fast evolving breed of the dynamic Indian woman leaves me full of admiration and respect for the fairer and in no ways the “weaker” sex as they were previously labeled.

On an average, Indian woman have progressed considerably over the past half a century.

There are still sections of the society where improvement is required but the day of equality is not far away….it most definitely is not far away…….

I would love to define an average Indian woman or the perfect “Desi Girl” as the film Dostana puts it :)

The Indian woman is beautiful…. From within as well as well from the outside….committed to her work and to her roots….

The Indian woman is the embodiment of multitasking….She is a mother, a housewife, a daughter, a boss ( or an employee )…..and so much more…

The Indian woman is a picture of utmost gorgeousness … the manner in which she drapes the chunni, the manner in which she brushes that lock of hair out of her eyes, the manner in which they blush when they receive a compliment, the manner in which they stand up and face the world when they fight for a cause, the manner in which they laugh when they feel free from within…..

The Indian woman sacrifices without blaring their horns…they will silently sacrifice for the greater good and not let anybody know about the pain they went through.

The Indian women have evolved into a confident force who refuse to be taken lying down and are determined to make their mark.

The Indian woman is always the patient listener who calms you down, makes you see the positive side of things and makes life a whole lot better.

The Indian woman is figurative yet fiery……..playful and serious all at once…they are bindaas

The Indian woman is a breath of fresh air, hard working, talented and passionate about her dreams.

That one smile, the playful eyes, shy expression, confident touch, humility and steely yet demure character can only and only be present in an Indian woman….

Cheers to the Indian woman…. Life is dull without them, life cannot go on without them…they are the inspiration, they are the gems….they are different from the rest…because they are found ….only and only in INDIA :)

GOODBYE....JUMBO, THE SUPERMAN : ANIL KUMBLE

2008-11-02T03:04:00.000-08:00

I feel very sad today, as every other true Indian cricket lover will be….. The JUMBO of Indian cricket has decided to call it a day. I got a real shock when the giant screen proclaimed that Anil Kumble had decided to hang up his boots. I was expecting his retirement decision to come after the series but certainly not on the last day of the Kotla test.

His relentless commitment and on field aggression have been thoroughly talked about and discussed by people worthier than me and by people who have shared the dressing room with him. I remember Anil Kumble as a perfect gentleman, the cricketer with a big heart and steely resolve. I met Anil Kumble in Lucknow when India was playing England at the KD Singh Babu stadium way back in 1994 - 1995 and Mohd Azharuddin was the Indian captain. He made me sit on his lap and signed my cap for me….that is how I remember Anil Kumble…the man with a golden heart…he had offered me some sugar coated chewable candy as well and I remember divesting him of his entire strip of candy. My dad still reminds me of the details :)

The determination with which he took the field with a broken jaw against the West Indies and got Brian Lara out lbw is a part of cricketing folklore. His 10 wickets against Pakistan at the Kotla is a ballad sung by cricket lovers even to this day. He has been a wonderful statesman of the Indian cricket team.

It has been rightly said that the BCCI should award Anil Kumble a lifetime pension for the services he has rendered. The hundred which he got at the Oval and the manner in which he celebrated shows the passion with which he played the game. Shane Warne and Muralidaran may have more wickets but they do not have a test century to their credit, do they ??? :)

A golden hearted man in real life as well, Anil has made himself available for several social causes.

A truly gifted individual with determination that can move mountains, it is shameful that towards the end of his career, critics took hearty digs at him now that their sitting duck Sourav Ganguly was gone. All of us should take our hats off to the wonderful cricketer, brilliant spinner and marvel that Anil Kumble is….He is truly one of the greatest of all time. I salute him and wish him all the best for his future. Godbless you Anil…..

“When you look at India as a team, their record at home probably compares to Australia's as best in the terms of win record. But our performance outside gets highlighted only because the difference between our show at home and abroad is too much.” : ANIL KUMBLE

"Anil Kumble has been a great servant of Indian Cricket and I use the word servant carefully because he has never tried to be the master. " : HARSHA BHOGLE

Ego Boosting :D :D

2008-11-01T11:15:00.001-07:00

Well, just to add to my earlier post, the people at dream Job suggested that I should look more presentable so I underwent a makeover.................

DO not be alarmed, it is just some ego pampering, we all want to look good, dont we ???????????????? :) CIAO

MEMORIES>>>>COMIN THICK AND FAST....

2008-11-01T10:43:00.000-07:00

Well, thats a weird me, hosting Sportscenter on ESPN [ I am looking very weird, has shaving rashes :( ]

With the fabulous, Team 18

With Ravi Shastri again

Sleepy, at 3 am still shooting..... :)

With the dazzling Ravi Shastri :) Man...he is tall :)

Last from the right, with Gautam Bimani (centre)..You ll know him if
you watch cricket :)

That's me 2nd from the left, 2nd row

Well Memories are just flooding me today, I was a part of ESPN STAR's CLINIC ALL CLEAR DREAM JOB on Star Cricket and being a part of a reality show (which very few people watched) I can safely say that I was genuinely surprised to see the warmth amongst the 18 of us......

Jatin, Lara, Medini, Vinayak, Akshobh, Sachith, Isaac, Faisal, Siddharth, Pooja, Arvind, Shirin, Hemant, Kartik, Siddharth Raman, Nishant and Emaad....You guys were fabulous.... you really were... Thank you for a wonderful time....I will never forget all of you and I will never forget those two weeks, I made it to the top five but then the experience was mind blowing...

Sigh....Memories are made of some dreamy things, I lived one of my dreams during those two weeks ..... CIAO

MEMORIES :)

2008-11-01T05:32:00.000-07:00

This was my first work to be published in print :) HMMMM or maybe my second....I dont exactly remember, but what I do remember is that it gave me a lot of joy and pride. (It also made me richer by 2000 bucks, but then the money did n0t matter that much, it was the icing on my small cake )....Gosh ! sometimes I just have to look back and I have a treasure trove of memories to choose from :) CIAO (PS Click on the pictures to enlarge it for reading purposes )

HURRAH !!

2008-11-01T02:33:00.000-07:00

Hurrah ! At last, part of my dream has come true. I have finished with the written manuscript for my dream project. "NONE : THE CHOSEN ONE" is very close to my heart and if god willingly it is published ( if I am lucky that is :) ) then I fancy the cover page to closely resemble this....(its horrible I know ....but still :) it is close to my dream cover) I will pre release a quotation from my book (self righteous brat that I am ) "The human brain is a receptive medium for sarcastic encouragement "

If you read the quotation carefully and read in between the lines , you will probably grasp the plot of the book.......

I will say no more :) and I shall keep my fingers crossed. I shall uncross them after August 2009 :).

My heart bleeds for the people of Assam. How horrible and my deepest sympathies are with the affected families.

Many congratulations to Vishwanathan Anand for doing us proud again :)

CIAO

2008-10-29T00:25:00.000-07:00

What do you do when your aunty and your uncle pass away in a space of two days??? Nothing much...I am shocked and numb...cannot explain much...God Bless their souls...My bitterness has made me see some very horrible sights...I regret my mistakes...Will get back soon. My condolences to my cousins and my dad because he has lost his sister. May their souls rest in peace.

2008-10-29T00:20:00.000-07:00

Once in a thousand years, there comes a person, who rises above the heads of ordinary men and stands up for what is right. Once in a thousand years, there comes a person, capable of taking decisions which other people fear to take. Once in a thousand years, there comes a person, who becomes an entity, a symbol of hope for the downtrodden. The world is breeding corpulent corruption and hatred and it needs someone to take a stand. Once in a thousand years, there comes a person who risks it all for the greater good. Once in a thousand years, there comes a person, who sacrifices without fear. My time has come….

SEX AND THE INDIAN CITY

2008-10-26T23:53:00.000-07:00

When we talk about sex nowadays, we do not disappear behind our friend’s back or flip the burkha back over our faces. Sex in India today, is discussed with a lot of fervor, spice and openness. The degree to which the openness (regarding discussions on the topic of sex) has reached in the Indian metros especially Mumbai and Delhi, is alarming to see. Heck!!! Its progress :)

The one thing which irks me no end , is the manner and unsubtle way in which these topics are discussed and treated. I am no moral guardian but I firmly believe that topics like these should be discussed in a subtle manner. To give you an example and prove my point, I would like to recount an incident which took place whilst I was seated with some of my friends at Karims (A delicious Kabab joint in Delhi). A group of guys were seated in the table opposite to ours. Now at this point, in walked a beautiful girl with a nerdy boyfriend. Immediately the group of guys started off …“Hot a** man !!”,”Want her in b** with me”,” Awesome t*** man!!”. The poor girl looked at her boyfriend for support who turned blue with fear and whisked her out of the joint. Frankly…I knew that Delhi was a loud place…but then I never knew that it was this loud….

I was hanging out with one of my friends and his girlfriend ( a big mistake) when they started off on this highly embarrassing conversation. Let us name my friend A and his girlfriend B…

A: Yeah, I don’t think that I can f*** anyone after B.

B: My friends have experimented a lot, every other night , they f*** a different guy.

A: Yeah but they don’t do it like us Babe (smiling)

B: Shut up, I have a sore back from the last time.

A: But you have to admit, the first time was fun….

B: Yeah, sweet but some pain as well..

Me: Ahem….cough !!! cough !!!

B: Have you f**** anyone ??? (directed at me)

Me: (turning blood red)…Ahem…no no….

B: Whaaaat???...You mean to say you haven’t experimented???

Me: (turning violet)….Er…no no….

A: F*** man!!! You have missed out on a lot…Why don’t you catch somebody from college and sc** her (laughs)

Me: Would stop with all these f**** already???

A: ha ha ……….

B: Tell me when you are ready…I have some nice friends….

Me: (grimly) are you running a prostitute centre???

B: (nervously)…Er….no no…..

Me: Lets finish the conversation then…

Phew….I was happy to get out that place with my life, brain and virginity intact…..

I am not against sexual topics and body contours :) being discussed because people cannot be stopped :)…but all I would like to see is some subtlety…When you are discussing it with your friends, keep your voice frequency tuned down so that it is audible only to your group members. When you are commenting on body contours ( you should not be doing so in the first place but anyway ….), please say it in your mind or whisper it under your breath…because when it is loud, it is nothing better than eve teasing and harassment…it could get you into trouble as well if the boyfriend is built like Sylvester Stallone.

Now the moral guardian…thinks that is time….to sign off :) CIAO and A VERY HAPPY DIWALI TO ONE AND ALL….Best wishes and lots of luck :)

OF PORN AND P :)

2008-10-26T01:04:00.000-07:00

This is the recounting of an incident involving me and a certain friend of mine :) I will name her P :) She reminded me of this incident yesterday when she called me up after 3 months. (Not fair P…you took so long :) ) Now this happened when I was in class XI and the number of porn movies watched per day was your status symbol amongst boys. Now on a bright sunny morning, COFAS, our school’s International Computer Olympiad was inaugurated. Being a part of the school team… I mingled with the contestants from the other schools….and then I ran into P….I still remember that I had suppressed a loud guffaw when I had first seen her. Blue eyes, a gold earring in one ear and a SILVER one in the other…. :) BLACK LIPSTICK !!!!! Gothic :) (P is going to kill me later….) She was pretty enough to look at (There you go P….. :) ) and we hit off straightaway (not just because she was pretty :) but because we were competing in the debate against one another and I always like to know my competition better :) )

There was a free for all class going on in our division. Students from any college (especially the outstation and international ones) were encouraged to pay these classes a visit. I sat down in the last row along with P. To my surprise P took out a bunch of SUPERMAN comics from her bag….This gothic girl was turning out to be a real tomboy…Later she confessed that she had harbored an infatuation for the chaddi clad superhero….Sick I say !!! He is a brilliant superhero I must confess, but then how on earth can girls fall for a guy who wears his underwear on top of his tights ??????? Anyway, soon we were immersed in the comics without paying a microgram worth of attention to the teacher Ms Khanna (whom we had labeled as an Ostrich…Sorry Maam :) ) Suddenly our peon, who always carried a kiloton of paan in his mouth and adorned the walls of the college with his post renaissance paan paintings, burst into the classroom. “Maam….we have discovered porn cds hidden in the bathroom....they were hidden in the western toilet water tank”. F**K!!! and I must have said F**K about a thousand times under my breath because P pinched me and held my hand tightly to stop my flow of F**KS. Man !!! this was bad for our college’s reputation in front of the outstation candidates. Ms Khanna had enough common sense to take the peon outside the class. After a few minutes she came back in and announced in her quivery voice “Nimish…stand up please!!!”…Now Nimish was the ultimate porn dealer of our school. His collection of porn cds and dvds was unsurpassed. Rumor has it that he had a Godrej Almirah in his room which was stuffed with carnal viewing instruments. Nobody had seen it of course :)

Now Nimish had been suspended earlier because he had been trapped by the college authorities trying to smuggle in pornware into college. The pornware was confisticated ( I have a sneaky suspicion that the college authorities struck it rich that day…..They fled with the pornware and god knows what they did at home with it :)….I may be wrong but then :) ). Our teacher asked him to step outside the classroom and calamity struck when she did so. Our class had a detachable, hanging blackboard and while Maam and Nimish were passing it, Maam’s hand accidentally hit the blackboard hard. The blackboard swung slightly to the right……HORRORS!!!! A couple of porn cds dropped to the ground unwedged from their hiding place behind the blackboard. We all rushed to have a closer look. One look at the blonde on the cover of one of the cds almost made Maam pass out. Holding Nimish’s hand firmly she stormed out of the class to interrogate him. Some students swear that Maam was muttering “Ram…Ram kitna bada paap !!! “ while she was breezing out of the class. P and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. We enjoyed a lovely two days together and I still remember that after I had won the debate, P was the only one who had run up to me and given me a big hug. She had cried a lot because she was from Ahmedabad and she had to return once the competition had ended. I gave her one of my favourite books to keep and her tears vanished instantly. Later after a month P called me up to say that she loved me, I was pleasantly surprised, but then I wanted to be a very good friend and nothing more. She took that very well and today she is one of my 4 “girl” friends (not girlfriends :) ) and is constantly giving me insights into the female brain….Thanks a ton P…..Miss you…and will never forget those two days and the black lipstick :)

FORTRESSES OF SOLITUDE.....

2008-10-25T01:19:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since I have been in the company of a girl or you may say that I have not been out on a date in years :). I often have wondered and dreamt about holding a soft hand, whispering into a delicate ear, smelling her lovely perfume and making her laugh. There is this lovely lake just beside my house as you may see in the picture above. It is one of my favourite places in Navi Mumbai.

I visit this place about thrice a week....The cool breeze does wonders to my mood....and lifts my spirits up a notch...but then this place also hurts me in a strange way... The most dominant forces of nature have bowed before my stubborn resistance...as a result of which I have frequented this place inspite of storms and heavy rains wrecking havoc on this lovely little fortress of solitude.

This boulevard also holds a very special place in my heart....This is the road I visit when I am extremely blue...I even got into a scuffle with a thug on this very road. The ensuing days saw me nursing a swollen eye and the thug maybe was nursing a sore pair of balls :) This path is very eerie in its location but very pleasant in a strange way because it provides blue people like me a chance to trample back and forth and shout my lungs out till my frustration is fully vented.

There is also a wasteland close to my house where I roam about in the blazing sun to calm myself down...like a ghost haunting a lonely mansion...I am mad you say ??? :) Everybody tells me that and I have stopped listening to people a long time back....

I am longing to be in the company of someone...and I am yearning for it simply because...I want to give love for once and see it appreciated...all these years my love has been kicked about and shoved into dustbins with contempt as if it was a toy :)...My love has never been cherished :)
Maybe it has got something to do with the fact that I give my heart out easily...too easily....Whenever I am scalded ....I turn to my fortresses of solitude.....they will me on to go back stronger and one day.....maybe one lucky day I will be able to do what I am posing to do below...

and say "I LOVE YOU" :) :) CIAO

MY LIFE'S CRUEL METAPHORS....

2008-10-24T22:00:00.000-07:00

Cut open....bleeding like a stream of lava in hell............

Wounds stinging like a thousand needles pricking my hide.......

Tears fighting to burst out.....like a camp of rebels with a purpose......

Mind numb.....like a patient anesthetized for a brain transplant......

Eyes red....like a red rose with poisonous thorns........

Heart broken.....like an insect crushed underfoot.......

Feelings not in control....like a mob hell bent on killing......

Fed up of it all.....like a prisoner force fed milk through a hose.....

Scared and frightened.....like a convict awaiting the noose......

Waiting for somebody to understand.....like a mother expectant of her children.....

Betrayed.....like a lover by the one he wants the most.....

Tired and exhausted......like a labourer who builds a mausoleum all by himself.......

Confused.....like a fox who misses the camouflaged chameleon........

Angry.....like a pan full of onions on a high flame..............

Sad.....like a soldier who has not gone home in a year.......

Out of love and empathy.....like a bottle drained of its last traces...........

ON THE RUN

2008-10-24T06:42:00.000-07:00

Once again....my scars are hurting me....once again my heart is having that sinking feeling....Sad songs give me solace and in some way fuel the sadness. It all begins when my scars start itching .....I am no Harry potter but I feel my scars hurt when danger or sadness is lurking around the corner.

Its all very choky at the moment.....Its all deja vu'.....I cannot begin to explain.....I cannot begin to reconcile..........I cannot start crying....I cannot stop grimacing..... Its a monopoly and an unfair one....I know I do not hold the cards...but I am still there at the roulette table. Something tells me that I should back off...because I am going to lose heavily...but then like every other fool who takes risks...I find myself still there. I know that at the end of the night...I am going to lose all my money.

What saddens me is the way I lose my ground. Life offers you a batter of the best sauces of sadness and happiness mixed together...mine tastes too sad and cruel.The old dreams are haunting me....I am a different man now....Drastic changes have affected me....I am moodier, gloomier, scared, looking over my shoulder for that fatal blow....I am living every minute like a convict on the run. I beg for refuge at someone's house.....

The saddest part is that....nobody understands me and gives me a place to stay.....I thought they would.....but sadly...I am an outcast now....I am on the run....not for long....My time is nearly up.

TRAPPED INSIDE THE BOX....

2008-10-20T21:56:00.000-07:00

The mental disintegration of a human mind is one of the most destructive procedures I have ever known. Nuclear Bombs appear less dangerous in such cases. The stumbling blocks are politics, religion and the human ego. We all live in our individual glass houses. Every single one of us is born with a brain so powerful and so dynamic that it is capable of creating new galaxies, stunning constellations and beautiful planets. When was the last time you asked yourself "How does water appear inside a coconut???" (silly question I know :) ) . When was the last time you asked YOURSELF the solution to the global economic crisis instead of banking on the expert's solution??
We are all becoming zombies, absorbed with our own problems, busy with our own lives, tensed due to our own situations....When was the last time that we thought out of the box???? Not recently.....not in a very long time.....We are all dependent on the eternal newspapers and the ever so loud news channels to act as catalysts and send our brain into the analytical zone.....This is the disintegration of the human mind......It needs catalysts to think.......Barring a few exceptions...all of us....whether we accept it or not have mentally degraded ourselves...with the all time favorite excuse "I DO NOT HAVE TIME" .
Those that think out of the box are termed as "WEIRDOS" or "MENTALLY ILL" people :)
Unfair :) . Not all of them mind you.....but a majority of them. The world has always in most cases, mocked and ridiculed people who have dared to be different, think differently.
If you need to send your brain into that analytical overdrive without a catalyst,I suggest a very simple exercise. Visit the nearest slum house or carefully observe street children. A few days back, I observed a child who was selling flowers at the traffic signal and everything from the Economic order to poverty to child labour crossed my mind. Sometimes to think out of the box...you do not need an inspiration....sometimes you just need to look outside the glass house you are living in.
We all blame the government, the government blames us and we end up going nowhere. If we blindly say that India is the greatest country in the world, then we are wrong.......India has the POTENTIAL to become the greatest country in the world. We find refuge in the excuse that we have a rich culture, moral ethos and good values. Does this mean that the progressive nations in the west have bad morals?? In case we have not noticed, we are about a hundred years behind them in terms of development. It's time to take stones and smash the glass house.......It is time to wriggle our brains and come up with thoughts and ideas which will make others sit up and take notice...But if you do not have the time, nobody is asking you to leave your couch...enjoy yourself :)

50

2008-10-18T08:27:00.000-07:00

We don’t have time left to regret (hold on)
It will take more than common sense (hold on)
So stop your wondering take a stand (hold on)
There's more to life than just to live (hold on)

'cause an empty room can be so loud
It's too many tears to drown them out
So hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

One single smile a helping hand
It's not that hard to be a friend
So don’t give up stand 'til the end
There's more to life than just to live

'cause an empty room can be so loud
It's too many tears to drown them out
So hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

When you love someone
And they break your heart
don’t give up on love
Have faith, restart
Just hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

When it falls apart
And your feeling lost
All your hope is gone
don’t forget to hold on, hold on

'cause an empty room can be so loud
It's too many tears to drown them out
So hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

When you love someone
And they break your heart
don’t give up on love
Have faith, restart
Just hold on, hold on

'cause an empty room can be so loud
It's too many tears to drown them out
So hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

When you love someone
And they break your heart
don’t give up on love
Have faith, restart
Just hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

My 50th post..........and I am short on words.....this is an amazing song...very close to my heart......Thought I would dedicate it to myself :) Happy 50th to me ....CIAO

PROUD TO PRESENT....MUHAMMED ALI

2008-10-18T07:20:00.000-07:00

Hiya everyone...............the reason for me putting up this picture is very simple.....I am craving for a clean complexion once again. I have had an outbreak of rashes (shave burns or whatever) not very severe but damaging enough. I am now walking with my head bowed and my chest deflated. Another week until my face regains normalcy... Sob !!!! life is not fair....why cant men wear veils and burkhas??? Damn unfair........
Ok Ok.... :) I will stop posting pictures of myself....very narcissistic to say the least..... But hmmmmmmmm....I dont look that bad :) or do I :)
Did you think that I was about to go off on a sermon about Muhammed Ali??? Well, you were mistaken. The gentleman above, is the true Muhammed Ali of Indian cricket. He has been punched, criticized, disgraced and written off......but like Muhammed Ali, Sourav Ganguly has shown that he is not a one bout wonder. Scripting one of the greatest comebacks of all times, Sourav has sucker punched his critics....one last and resounding punch....total KO....What a wonderful and gritty knock at Mohali!!!....A wonderful end to a glittering career...........kudos Sourav............I salute you Dada...and those who feel Sourav has done nothing for Indian cricket ..F**K all of you.You guys do not see a gem when you see one..........CIAO

BURNS AND TURNS

2008-10-17T06:18:00.000-07:00

It is hot in Mumbai ....and when a person from UP tells you that it is hot....it really is. Walking home from college has become a nightmare. Nowadays when I start trekking back home from college, after a few minutes my right cheek and the right side of my face starts burning.....and I mean literally BURNING.....When the stinging gets unbearable, I walk backwards to ensure that the left side of my face gets equally stung and burnt. So now, if you see a guy resembling burnt toast walking about on the streets of Mumbai, do not be alarmed.....it would probably be me :) I am too proud to wear a cap (No....i am not Himesh) and I cannot tie a bandanna for nuts.....so I have to bear this torture while I walk back home and get tanned(or horribly burnt and scalded).

Freshers this year was horrible to say the least. NO LIGHTS ON STAGE !!!! F**K It!!! Atleast we did manage to get some light towards the end.....but that was about all. The Mr and Miss Fresher competition was in one word.......HORRIBLE.....The male contestants turned up in multicolored cardigans and black waistcoats for some weird reason.... Guys....it is SUMMER and you are not Ranbir Kapoor cavorting about on the Swiss Alps.....so for heaven's sake...spare us....
and you sir...if you want to wear a waistcoat...please team it up with proper jeans otherwise....the "WAITER,WAITER !!!! " calls were totally justified.

Usha, I am so sorry....I know that you wanted to host the Mr and Ms Fresher contest....but sorry girl, John said no....(See...having a blog is useful...you can confess :) )

Prelims start from Monday.....so goodbye freedom :(

The uncertain economic crunch has had an impact on my life too.......Damn......I had to fire some of my employees ( Mr Fashion Conscious Abhik and Mr Narcissist Abhik) because maintaining them........just costs me too much.....it is back to torn Ts and dirty jeans for me :)

Be good everybody....I will be back...........ouch it's hot...... CIAO

MONEY SPEAKS.....BUT POWER SILENCES......

2008-10-16T07:19:00.000-07:00

Hiya one and all.....How are you all doin??? ( As if I care :) ) ( No NO I do care........Just kidding)

Money will buy you everything.....but power will give you bowed heads.......Am caught in the assignment whirlpool. Hopefully will post a proper post in a day or too....The fancy title was to catch your attention :) CIAO

ABHIKI : AN INTRODUCTION

2008-10-04T23:44:00.000-07:00

One of my good friends Prakhar has been witness to the creation of a new language created by me. I developed it way back in 2005 when I was still a nerd and spiked hair according to me was a sin against god...... The language is named....hold your breath ABHIKI...(Egoistic and self righteous name, aint it ?? :) )

I have modified and tweaked it up and I am proud to present the 36 alphabets of Abhiki (As if anybody cares !!!)

Tah Tbh Tch Tdh Teh Tfh

Rah Rbh Rch Rdh Reh Rfh

Iah Ibh Ich Idh Ieh Ifh

Pah Pbh Pch Pdh Peh Pfh

Tgh Thh Tih Tjh Tkh Tlh

Aah Abh Ach Adh Aeh Afh

The right diagonal alphabets Tah, Rbh, Ich, Pdh, Tkh and Afh are the vowels and the rest are the consonants.

This language displays a unique property and has a coded word form embedded in its 6 by 6 matrix structure along it's columns, Right diagonal and Left diagonal. This coded word form makes the language easy to remember and easier for me to use:). In my original format the only difference was that it was a tedious 9 by 9 matrix............way too big !!!!

Alternatively I will release the methods to use this language
....till then, here is something for you to chew on......

TfhRfhIchPfhTfhAfh Ich TghAehTfhAfh......

AND AGAIN.....

2008-10-02T23:28:00.000-07:00

Doing a lot of tags these days....Thanx Anshul

1. Which superhero/super heroine would you like to be for a day and why?
Drona……cause I think I can do a better job than Abhishek : )….Hmmm on second thought…The Dark Knight…Batman…his bat mobile is super cool.

2. If you had one hour to teach an underprivileged child something, what would you teach?
I would show the child the way to my house, treat him/her to an ice-cream. Later at home I would teach the child lots of stuff.

3. Whom would you like to share your favourite chocolate with?
Anshul, you devil!!!! Hmmmm. …… with my younger brother and…………..my angel…..if I am not overwhelmed with greed that is : )

4. Your choice for the Indian Youth Icon is……..
Hrithik Roshan and MS Dhoni

5. What would you do if your lover goes out on a “friendly date” with someone else?
I would be helpless :) Maybe I would take her out the very next day and woo her off her feet.

6. The most romantic thing your lover has ever done/said?
Private……Hmmm….Ok….Once she told me to say her name thrice cause she liked hearing it in my voice….I loved it….every bit of it.

7. What would fascinate you more : A boat ride at night or a car drive in the alps?
A boat ride at night most definitely …with excellent music….heck…. the car drive would be damn good as well.

8. When was the last time you swore and at whom/for what?
A few minutes ago….cause my net connection was irritating the hell out of me.

9. The last person to make you smile and feel warm…..
My best friend Sitanshu, My brother and My angel………..all in the same day…….

10. Would you ever go out for a date with your ex?
Never….in the name of all that is good…..But if you have a good and understanding ex…I do not find anything wrong with it….

11. Who is the person you would love to invite to your next birthday party cause you miss him/her (and you want a gift from that person AND that person has never attended your birthday before)?
Anshul ,brother….. this is the weirdest tag question I have ever answered…Hmmm ok…now there are three actually…. 1. Angel 2. Sourav Ganguly 3.Jyoti

12. You would be over the moon right now if…..
I cured my headache and cleared my congestion.

13. Describe your gang of friends in three words.
MAD, MAD, MAD

14. If you held a time bomb in your hand standing in the middle of a crowded street which will explode in 5 minutes, you would….
Open a manhole cover, fling the bomb as far away as possible and scream at everybody to vacate the place…

15. The one bit of advice you would give your best friend…..
He is smarter than I am : ) …..Hmm….he could gain a few pounds though…

16. Your favourite one liner is ………….
I have four : If you haven’t been with me, you have missed out on a lot.
Why so serious??
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.
Some people respect the badge, everybody respects the gun.

17. Your favourite piece of electronic gadgetry is ……
My mp3 player….it is my best non-living pal.

18. The one thing about your school that you really miss…..
The assemblies….I used to strut about cause I was the house captain…lotsa fun…and of course the English Literature classes.

19. Describe the person who tagged you in a single line….
A brilliant scholar and a laugh a second machine……

20. List of people you want to tag…
Pseudo intellectual, No Mute Spectator

Have fun and do not be bored : ) CIAO

I CRUSHED....THE CRUSH :)

2008-10-01T22:32:00.000-07:00

College crushes and school romances always make you giggle and blush....Those candy floss like sweet moments are really a treasure trove and if you have had a reasonable number of caramel sweet experiences like I have ,then life is not that bad after all.

My first ever crush was this beautiful and utterly cute looking girl in the La Martiniere Girl's College choir. Since the boys and the girls colleges used to meet up during Christmas and celebrate it with a common choir...those days of practice for me were complete bliss. How lovely she was!! During the first year, I sung with the sopranos and in the second year I sung with the altos (I never got to sing base:( ). All the time my eyes used to be on her while we sung. Once or twice our eyes did meet and she smiled in a sweet, innocent way that all cute girls do...... I never got to know her name. The last time I saw her was at the end of the performance when she was holding a candle in her hand and looking very pretty in white......

My second crush was in high school and the girl in question was again cute and very likable ( or so I felt). The manner in which i proposed to her was downright funny. That day I left home with steely determination. I tried to speak to her during the assembly but I failed. I made a desperate move. When she hurrying up the stairs, I caught her arm and took her into the college sick room. After bolting the door ( I still remember that I was trembling) I proposed. She agreed and the "affair" ended after a year and a half. ( We parted ways amicably).

There was this girl whom I danced with during our Lyons house cock house party. It was the first time in my entire life that a girl told me that, "Abhik, I think you are cute"...bliss... :)

When I became the captain of my house in school, I faced a reasonable number of requests for dates.....but I did not fancy a single one... ( All the attention bloats you up though I must say.....)

The best moment of all was when I told this warm, adorable and extremely beautiful girl via sms that (you know...THAT thing :) )....It was and will be one of the singularly most beautiful moments of my life. I remember that I rushed to the temple near my house.... trembling, sweating and praying with all my heart. God answered my prayers :). The phone conversation after this incident was fantastic and will always remain close to my heart....... I love my life.... :) CIAO

DAD...MY DAD

2008-10-01T10:11:00.000-07:00

It's not father's day....but still ....today I have a gamut of emotions stirring within my chest. This post is dedicated to my father Ashok Chatterjee.He is in my estimate the most courageous and morally correct person I have ever seen in my entire life. It's true that all of us admire our dads and in our eyes...everybody's dad is the perfect one......but my dad is kinda different. Heard this statement several times earlier ? :) Dont worry...I will not bore you and that is a promise :)

My dad lost his father at the tender age of 15. He was the last son in a family of 7 boys and 2 girls. My dad never got to pursue his dream....he wanted to become either an IAS officer or a doctor. His educational aspirations were not realised because nobody funded his education. My dad was a brilliant Table Tennis player. He got selected for the UP under 19 tournament but at the last moment my grandmother fell ill and he quit just so that he could be with her. He paid his Class X , XI and XII fees by working in a sugarcane factory at night. He had just one set of his school uniform and no shoes......But still he topped his school in the CLASS X and XII board exams.

My dad has suffered in his professional life, I am not afraid to say that we lost several of our treasured possessions.......but even at the age of 54 my dad is still fighting. My babba still sleeps with me when I run a fever, he still sits up with me at night to watch cricket matches, he still guides me and corrects me whenever I am wrong. He is very affectionate...my dad....he really is...We average a hug a day (and a hug every 2 days when he is angry with me). His "Achcha Babu" is something I do not want to leave home without when I set out for college.He has provided me with everything that a son can wish for.My dad a Bsc,Msc,LLB,MPA is still my inspiration. Which man will leave a foreign job just because his mother doesn't want him to leave her?? Very few people will......He treats us every time he has money. He never thinks about buying that Arrow shirt or that Colorplus pant but he will always buy me my Lee jeans......

Love you Dad....for being there for me. I am proud to be your progeny, your son....I hope I make you proud. I wanted to say so much more.....but I cant......too emotional right now :) ...CIAO

TAGGED AGAIN

2008-09-30T22:04:00.000-07:00

Many thanks to “pseudo intellectual” for sending this tag along. Thanx angel…..Was getting bored….This spiced things up a bit :):)

The rules for the tag are:
RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
RULE #2 Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
I would definitely smash a glass or two, maybe even hurt myself in the process :)

2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
Sign my book for someone sitting next to me in flight.(The person should not have the vaguest idea that I am the author……he/she should be reading the book :))

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
Sycophants and self centered politicians.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
Lock it away into a safety vault…….on second thoughts…….travel around the world with family and someone special :):)

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
Never…..friendship is something on a very different plane....

6. Which is more blessed: loving someone or being loved by someone?
Both…….shiver me timbers…….I love love :):)

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you love?
Forever…….

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what will you do?
I do not think I can secretly like someone…..I would tell the person on her face………..then I would sit back and watch her reaction.

9. If you could root for one social cause, what would it be?
There would be 3 causes actually…..Child Labour, AIDS and Cerebral Palsy

10. What takes you down the fastest?
A smile flattens me, a giggle mows me down and bad breath annoys me.

11. Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?
In heaven maybe :):) Don’t wanna have a long life and suffer :):)

12. What’s your fear?
Not keeping my family happy.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
This is not the ideal place to describe her…..Hmmm …. she is an angel…warm…intelligent and very ,very special to me.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?
Married and happy…..whenever I do get hitched that is…..

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
Say my prayers and snore again…..

16. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously who will you pick?
The one whose eyes reflect my heart.

17. Would you give all in a relationship?
Definitely…..but I practice restraint in some matters.

18. Would you forgive and forget someone no matter how horrible a thing he has done?
I would definitely forgive…..but I would never forget.

19. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?
I live and breathe for someone…..the thought makes me infinitely happy and contented.

20. List of 6 people to tag:
I am acquainted with only one person who blogs on blogspot……so frankly….this question will remain unanswered.