The idea for this post came about when one fine day (not too long ago...) I decided to sport a Johnny Depp like moustache..... in case you are wondering what I am talking about...I will make it even clearer with a picture...
So I turned up in college the next day...brimming with the newfound confidence one gets filled with after downing a couple of pegs....and I headed straight for my Microprocessor practicals...One of my friends looked at me and swore loudly....the other burst out laughing...the girls started giggling...and my self confidence took a tumble like a pig on roller skates !!After the practicals I ran into a friend of mine from the Computer Engineering Department who smiled beatifically at me and said, " Kya Abhik...Johnny Deep...". I cursed him inwardly and corrected him, " Depp not Deep ". My luck was as rotten as rat puke that day.....I ran into some of my other friends. Their only aim in life according to me is to ridicule and mock anyone who does not belong to their group and is an intruder trespassing on their territory. The extent of their territory is determined by the positions at which they have scattered themselves.The places which fall under their jurisdiction include the areas which they frequent ( to leer at girls) and the pieces of collegescape (landscape modified...) they have marked with their spit ( or urine..oooppsss...). On spotting me, one of them hopped towards me like a frog on uppers.Using some kind of primitive hand symbols( frankly I thought his fingers resembled toothpicks) he called the rest of the group over...and within seconds they were all over me like ants on a french fry." Why did you keep a moustache??? Bilkul uncleji lag rahe ho..."," Saale moocha rakhne ke liye kisne bola tha ??", " Tu to chindi lag raha hai bilkul !!". With great difficulty I extracted myself from the clutches of the future Bollywood moustache stylists and fled down the staircase only to run into the girl I had found cute during my first few months in college....One look at me and she snorted into her handkerchief.The only person who did not laugh at me was the someone special I keep referring to in my posts...though if she would have seen me..maybe she would have laughed too...or maybe she would not have...
After I reached home I flung the mirror cabinet open and took out my razor....two impulses made me put the razor down..
1) It's my life.........
2) Who can claim to be a man if he has never sported a moustache at one time or another in his life??
After all my moustache does feel strokable and can be used for filtering water and milk if the need arises...so as of now...it's still there...
And since I experiment a lot...I decided to give the tiny ponytail a try....
The reactions were horrible again...people kept tugging at it...girls found it cute(the upside)..the guys found it "chindi"...the teachers found it odd and rebellious because they usually associate me with a plain and simple nerd...I accumulated a lifetime supply of rubber bands by begging for them at shopping malls and grocery stores.My enemies smirked and I give them the middle finger salute ( behind their backs) .My college watchman insisted that I must have had a dose of female hormones recently and remarked," Ye ladkiyon ki tarah chotti kyon baandh rakha hai ?? Tumhare papa-mummy kuchch kehte nahi kya??"...While my mom labeled me as a gangster, my dad told me to concentrate on my studies and to go and give the barber a visit...my solution was simple...I kept my hair normal at home and tied up my ponytail the moment I stepped out of the house...
The only positives to have come out of my moustache and ponytail are:
1)I now avoid the "Urinary Group".
2)I am now spending more than 10 minutes in front of the mirror(I get to skip Karela juice in breakfast when I am running late for college).....
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