Monday, May 14, 2012

AROUND MY "V"ORLD IN 80 MINUTES....



"The only reason why people get lost in thought, is because it is unfamiliar territory"


This was more or less my predicament before I was inducted into the world of mobile Internet and before I undertook that fun-filled journey that changed my "V"orld  forever.

I will now undertake the task of assigning names to all the characters in my plot, a little differently from what Jules Vernes assigned to his motley group of thrill-seekers in his book "Around the World in 80 days".

1. Myself : Silly-eous Dog  [SD]   (Phileas Fogg - in the original novel) - Owns an iPhone.

2. Nagarajan Parasuraman : Pass-the-ball-out   [PB]   (Passepartout - in the original novel) - Owns a Nokia Lumia.

3. Deepika Shrivastava : Aao-na   [AN]  (Aouda - in the original novel) - Owns a Nokia C3.



(Left to right : Pass-the-ball-out, Aao-na, Silly-eous Dog)

(P.S : So that it becomes easier for you to visualise the story :-D )

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6:00 PM - Sunday

Silly-eous Dog and his faithful accomplice, Pass-the-ball-out, are engaged in a "serious" game of Kick-my-Boss, on their mobile phones while sipping on Bournvita.

SD : Hahahahaha ... Look Pass-the ball-out,  I have cut my boss into tiny pieces using a Samurai Sword...

PB :  I have bettered you Sir, I have punctured him using millions of pins and have given him the most horrible wedgie ever hahahahahahaha

SD : Cheers Pass-the-Ball out !!!!

[Tries to clink glasses, but ends up spilling the drink onto Pass-the-ball-out's pink pants]

PB : Damn Sir !!! To clean Brown stains on pink pants is a feat as impossible as removing Sachin Tendulkar from the current Indian Team.

SD :  Enough Pass-the-ball-out...I am fed up of your Sachinisms !!! [Goes for a violent swig of Bournvita , but discovers that he has spilt all of it]  BTW, any idea of what the score is ?

PB : Just a moment Sir... [Checks the score using the Cricbuzz app] Mumbai Indians are on top Sir !! Sachin has scored a fifty !!!

SD : Hehehehehe [Gloats gleefully]

Suddenly Justin Bibier's "Baby" blares out from Silly-eous Dog's phone..... 

PB : Is this your new ring tone Sir ?

SD : Yes, I downloaded it last night, amazingly fast...Vodafone's download speeds are great !!!

PB : [sniggers and snorts into his Bournvita] Baby indeed....

SD : [conversing with Aao-na]  Hello....yes....Hi Aao-na :-) ....I am at home...What? You want a green jade neck-piece?...But the only two neck-pieces I know about are the hang-man's noose and my bachelor's tie...I was only joking Dear...Of course, I am not crazy...My Mother had me tested !!! You need it in 80 minutes ??? Why ??? Oh !! So that loon is celebrating her birthday tonight... No No No No No Dear !!! Did you hear loon ?? I said "boon"...I meant , "What a boon that she is celebrating her birthday tonight !!!" I ' ll get it for you in 80 minutes flat, don't you worry...bbye..."

PB :  I understand that we have a quest ahead of us..

SD : Yes indeed !!! my faithful accomplice...There will be a day when mankind will fall in the search for green jade necklaces ...but not today...There will be a day when wolves will howl...but not this day !!!! There will be....

PB : [Interrupts] Sir, is this Shakespeare ?

SD : No Pass-the ball-out !! This is Aaragorm's speech from Lord of the Rings- Return of the King..I was downloading it from YouTube..Here..Have a peek..

PB : Extremely good picture quality Sir !! and may I add, what fast downloading speeds !!!

SD : What did you expect ? Its Vodafone 3G! I told you so :-) Now lets get cracking...we need to find a green jade necklace and buy it !

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6:10 PM

SD : [Screaming] COME OUT OF THE BATHROOM PASS-THE-BALL-OUT !!! HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE ???????

PB : Something is wrong with the Bournvita Sir !! [groans]

[Silly-eous's phone beeps]

SD : Hmmmm... A Whatsapp message from Aao-na... Hmmmm... So this is what the neckpiece should resemble [Looks at the image and scratches his head] Cool...atleast I know what to refer to :-)

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6:20 PM

SD : [Screaming] HOW MUCH LONGER ???

PB : Let me put on a pair of jeans atleast!! You have ruined my pink pants if your memory fails you Sir ! I' ll be as quick as Sachin between the wickets !!

SD : [bellows] I' LL KILL YOU !!!!

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6:30 PM

SD : Thank goodness, we are finally outside ! I ll just check Google Maps to find a jewellery or trinket store ! [grumbles] Sports Stores and Grocery Stores I can handle but this.... [shivers] Aaahh !!! We are in luck, there is one in Sector 29...Hurry Pass-the-Ball-out !!! [Kisses his phone]

PB : I just checked the bus routes on Google Sir !!! Bus number 529 should plonk us right in the heart of action...

SD : [affectionately / grudgingly ] Sometimes you amaze me Pass-the-Ball-out :-)

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 6:40 PM

SD : How long is this infernal bus ride going to last ???? And what exactly are you upto Pass-the-ball-out??

PB : Am ordering a pair of pink pants online Sir ! Its so easy n fun n convenient ! 

SD : [grumbles] You and your pink pants !!!!! By the way...you are sitting on a wad of bubblegum that someone left sticking to your seat...

PB : AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH !!!!!

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6:45 PM

SD : [rushing into the shop] Hurry up Pass-the-ball-out !!! Excuse me Sir ! Would you be having a neck-piece that looks something like this picture ?   

SHOPKEEPER : Of Course ! We have this piece packaged and imported from Hong-Kong. 300 rupees Sir ....

SD : Hmmm... Are you sure about the price ?

SHOPKEEPER :  Yes Sir ! you wont find a cheaper piece in any of the surrounding shops...

Silly-eous fiddles with his phone...

PB : What are you up to Sir ?

SD : [whispers] Keep him distracted..I am downloading an app...

PB : [whispers] Okay... [loudly] Is there a shop that sells pink pants around here ?

SHOPKEEPER : Ehhh ?????

SD : Shut up Pass-the-ball-out !! Am done with the downloading !! [mutters] Vodafone 3G jai ho !! [turns to the Shopkeeper ] Well my dear friend...could you hand me the box ?

The shopkeeper hands over the packed neck-piece box to Silly-eous who scans the box with his cell..

SD : You are a convincing liar... I ll give you that :-) I scanned your box bar-code with this amazing app called RedLaser  and found out that the MRP is Rs 180 only :-) Do you think that I am a doodle in pink pants to fall for your lies and your custom made MRP sticker??? eh ??? [shows the cell to the shopkeeper]

SHOPKEEPER : [gulps and surrenders meekly] So sorry Sir !!! Take it for Rupees 150 but please dont bad-mouth our shop !!!!

SD : Hmmmm...Deal...Gift wrap the box please !!!!

PB : Sir !! You are a genius !! This is so cool !!! It was so much fun looking at the shopkeeper's face !!

SD : I try Pass-the-ball-out... I try :-)

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7:00 PM (20 minutes from zero hour)

SD : All is lost Pass-the-ball-out !!! We cant reach Aao-na's place in time.... No bus can reach her house within 20 minutes and there is not a single auto-rickshaw to be seen...I will be slaughtered [weeps] I have failed!! I am ruined....

PB : Worry not Sir !! I have summoned a cool cab :-) Apparently there is an app to check whether there are any cabs in the vicinity and summon them to your location. The cab is already on its way :-) Infact...there it is :-)

SD : If there was a noble prize for an accomplice, I would cover it with pink confetti and offer it to you right away :-) Let us clink ibeers :-)



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7:15 PM

SD : Well, we are almost there :-) What a fun-filled day Pass-the-ball-Out :-) Our Vodafone powered Mobile Internet has been of great help...has it not ? :-)

PB :  Of course Sir ! But there are two things it did not help us with... 1. Manchester United lost the title and 2. You have forgotten the neck-piece at the shop....just like Sachin kept missing out on his hundredth hundred !!! there are no apps for these disasters :-)

SD : [hollers] PASS-THE-BALL-OUT !!! YOU INFERNAL BUFFOON !!!!


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"You will be served better if you are reading this blog post on your mobile device as I have written it via one :-) "

This blog post has been submitted as an entry for the "INTERNET IS FUN ON VODAFONE CONTEST" powered by Vodafone and Indiblogger.



Thank you Deepika, Nagarajan and Vodafone :-) Here is power to you at www.vodafone.in/fun

Images : Courtsey Vodafone

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